The English Football Thread

[11Drogba 2,000]

It's missing two letters there should be AB before the N.

That would sell more.

[Iggy Doonican 4,186]

Here's some extracts from Sam Allaradyce's autobiography.

Big Sam on… the Moon landings

“Neil Armstrong claims to be the first man on the Moon, and fair play to him, it’s a results business. But it’s not as if he flew there himself, is it? Any old duffer can sit in a metal box and get blasted into space. I’d like to have seen him try and navigate his way there using a dog-eared Esso Road Atlas. I’d have a lot more respect for him then.

“Also, I didn’t like that whole ‘one small step’ business. If it was me – and I admit, walking on the lunar surface is still an aspiration rather than an achievement at this stage – I would have taken a ruddy big step. You’ve got to get stuck in, show the Moon you’re not intimidated. He went down in my estimation after that.”

Big Sam on… Jesus

“It does rankle with me at times, the double standards you see in the press. Jesus walks on water and they build a religion around him. I get Bolton into the top six with one of the smallest budgets in the Premiership and everybody calls me a long-ball manager. Anyway, if Jesus is such a miracle worker, how come he got caught? You’ve got to win your battles.

“By the way, the walking-on-water thing is a myth. I’m not saying he didn’t do it, just that it’s easier than it looks. Any non-Newtonian fluid of a minimum viscosity can be subjected to a short period of shear stress if the body exerting the force is light enough – and people were a lot smaller in Biblical times, that’s a known fact. We actually tried it on a warm-weather camp in La Manga once. We filled the pool with cornflour and Sammy Lee was able to run across without breaking the surface. We’ve got the Prozone printouts to prove it.”

Big Sam on… Big Sam

“The perception of childbirth is that mothers do the donkey work, but I don’t live in the world of perception, I live in the world of reality. It was a nine-month slog to fight my way out of that womb, and although it wasn’t always pretty, I ultimately achieved my objective, on time and on budget.

“You’re there to be shot at when you’re a recently-fertilised embryo, so those months were all about keeping it tight, maintaining a good shape, concentrating on the process, making sure that when the opportunity presented itself, I grabbed it with both hands. Passing the magic 40-week mark was a big psychological boost, and a big accomplishment to put on my CV. It wasn’t an ideal introduction by any stretch, but at that early age you’re just glad of the work.

[Fulham Broadway 16,829]

Big Sam has said some good things recently about Wenger and Wet Spam fans.

He also hates the Spanish Waiter

[Jase 43,479]

Big Sam has said some good things recently about Wenger and Wet Spam fans.

He also hates the Spanish Waiter

And Benitez has hit back at Big Sam...

http://www.espnfc.com/real-madrid/story/2664301/rafa-benitez-how-many-trophies-has-sam-allardyce-won

Benitez dismissed Allardyce's remarks, and told Spanish radio station Onda Cero: "Do you know who Sam Allardyce is? Do you know how many trophies he has won? Well that's my answer. It is what happens when someone has a book to sell. His opinion does not have a lot of value.''

[Fulham Broadway 16,829]

And Benitez has hit back at Big Sam...

http://www.espnfc.com/real-madrid/story/2664301/rafa-benitez-how-many-trophies-has-sam-allardyce-won

So one of Alan Partridges suggestions could be used.

Inner City Sumo. Could be done quite cheaply in a pub car park.

[Iggy Doonican 4,186]

So one of Alan Partridges suggestions could be used.

Inner City Sumo. Could be done quite cheaply in a pub car park.

The wait is over F.B.

https://youtu.be/iGG5OhEcpOQ

[Fulham Broadway 16,829]

http://www.terribletv.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/monkeytennis2.jpg

[zolayes 14,489]

our U21s getting hammered at home ,, well more possession more attacks and 3 0 down ,, it wasnt on VIP box thank God

[Thendo 1,088]

Liverpools starting eleven seems very uninspiring not to mention their bench, all strikers except Origi out injured. Spurs really should win this one.

[communicate 2,703]

Origi looks like a very poor player. His hold up play is very poor

[Sir Mikel OBE 4,919]

Of fucking course Sterling scores when I take him out my team.

[Stingray 9,441]

Of fucking course Sterling scores when I take him out my team.

Hattrick in the first half lol

[DYC. 7,542]

Navas can't score a goal to save his life. That was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I couldn't even laugh at it.

[Sir Mikel OBE 4,919]

Hattrick in the first half lol

I'm officially on suicide watch lol.

[Blue-in-me-Veins 4,067]

What a goal be Dimitry Payet!

Such a huge fan of him.

Another away win for Bilic nd the Hammers.

[Laylabelle 9,351]

Man city and Man U on a different level at the moment.Can easily see a Manchester win unless arsenal pull something off

Lecister still doing pretty well

[zolayes 14,489]

basketball at St James 3 2 not HT yet

[KevinAshburner 1,270]

FULL TIME RESULT : NEWCASTLE UNITED WIN 6 -vs- 2 NORWICH CITY.

http://live.premierleague.com/#/gameweek/9/matchday/9/match/803248

NUFC - MATCH SUMMARY

Wijnaldum (14,26,66,85)
Ayoze Pérez (33)
Mitrovic (64)

Assists

Sissoko (14,26,64)
Janmaat (66)
Ayoze Pérez (85)


NORWICH CITY - MATCH SUMMARY

Mbokani Bezua (20)
Redmond (34)

Assists

Olsson (20,34)