Spike

Am I not allowed to enjoy a player and delight in watching him play at his best every week for the team I support?

Maybe it's because I fell in love with Juan Mata after that interception goal mere seconds after his debut but I really want him to stay. I really, really, really do. I just can't get my head around what has changed. Really what has? It's not like Mou always has hardworking players. Ozil is the laziest bastard in the world but he was Mou's darling for years. Why can't Mata be?

Hahah, I'm too punny for the BM.

Moyes is an idiot if he thinks that Mata will save him. Their squad suffers in the central midfield and heart of defence. Players that can't cut it at Man Utd anymore: Rafael da Silva: While I think he is a decent RB, I can't shake that feeling that his IQ test scores would be below 100. Nemanja Vidic: A shadow of himself. Broken by injuries. Patrice Evra: Can't defend, never has been able to. Tom Cleverly: Haha. Ryan Giggs: Too old and slow for the wings and can't defend well enough as a CM. Alexander Buttner: Like Evra he can attack well but can't defend. Ashley Young: Dive, dive, dive until you dive yourself to death. Rio Ferdiand: I think his body is breaking down and he just doesn't have the physicality to cut it anymore. Nani: Good at stepovers. Fabio da Silva: About as intelligent as his brother but with the added bonus of being less talented. Shinja Kagawa: Can only play one position (very well I might add) but he isn't even the best at the club in said position. They should deal with all these rubbish players before even thinking about Juan Mata.

I'll exit these rumours in a minute.

Yet CRonaldo achieved nothing except scoring a lot of goals. What an important player he is. All those cups and trophies with Madrid. I'm envious. No denying his individual talent, though.

Cap is too busy driving cabs and delivering babies in the backseats of said cabs to be posting here. #indiandoctorandcabdriver

There is no such thing as defending in the Eredivisie.

Eto'o: Maitre Blues est un chatte. Hazard: Ouais, Je suis d'accord. Suce moi bite.

All those captions are awful. Eto'o can not speak English that well. GOSH.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BAD JOKE OF THE DAY Eto'3

I could see his future more as a CM than a CF. But I'm not Mr Bean with AIDS so what do I know?

Why Melbourne over Brisbane? Nonsense. Question: What was your initial reaction to Abramovic buying the club?

He isn't my first choice CB but damn I'd never complain about having a beastly tank at the club. Who needs ten men to mow when there is one Zouma?

Holy shit Lallana is available? Lallana is a fucking boss player. I'd love him here, shame there is no room. DAMMIT

Best 5000th ever. I am honoured and very aroused.

Benfica aren't exactly financially healthy from what I've read; so maybe their hand was forced. They did make quite a tidy profit regardless.

Brave man.

I think the defensive nature of the Serie A is completely overrated. Too often do games have goals galore to justify such a reputation.

I always forget how great Gary Cahill is. Everytime I see him play, I am always impressed. Onya Gazza.

Do you get dick pics?

Do you mean Moreno? You do this all the time. Are you dyslexic or something?

I'm a victim of the awful search system.