Iggy Doonican

A short list of entertaining losers Mr Bean Arsenal Laurel and Hardy Liverpool Steptoe and Son

Is going to be a great atmosphere on Sunday so those wanna be ultras Crystal Palace fans can fuck right off.

Oh ye of little fate.

The media who lost there fucking mind over Brendan Rogers last season begin at long last to wake up that he's a limited manager. Buys utter shit with the Suarez money exactly what AVB did with the Bale money (both former coaches under Mourinho coincidence?). Anyway here's a stat of how he's got the best out of his forwards this season. Sturridge has been injured admittedly but Sturridge 4 goals, Borini 1 goal, Balotelli 1 goal, (has he scored in the premier league?), Lambert 2 goals. Again fair enough they haven't played regularly but Ivanovic who is a right back has scored i think 6 times this season.

Gianfranco is the best player i've ever seen in a Chelsea shirt and the King Of Stamford Bridge Peter Osgood comes next. Here's my favourite Zola goal. I knew when that goal went in all the years of frustration and pain were over and our name was on the cup. https://youtu.be/u3ImWZStSyA

Tear up in a caravan. A Millwall fan having a domestic?

True legend. When he came back in the dressing room after the warm up he was asked '' What's the pitch like Chopper?'', he replied ''It's a bit firm but there legs will take a stud''.

This might be an urban myth but i read that some guy went into a tattooists in Argentina and asked for a River Plate tattoo that would cover his whole back. Unfortunately for him the tattooist was a Boca Juniors fan who proceeded to tattoo a massive cock and balls on his back.

Met an Arsenal mate of mine today he said '' Fucking Chelsea all you do is park the bus''. I said that's not true and if you want proof there will be a bus going slowly around the Fulham Road next month.

He's a thick man trying to be clever. He will always say oh they set up wrong and then talks total bollocks. This is a man who don't forget was hired and fired in pre season with Millwall. I'm no fan of Joey Barton but i did have to laugh on 5live a few weeks ago. Claridge was slagging some manager off can't remember who and Barton said '' Well that's why he's a premier league manager and your the ex manager of Woking'' ha ha brilliant.

Well done Eden well deserved. And even though English is not his first language he's easier to understand then Harry Kane who sounds like he's got a bag of marbles in his mouth

That preening fuckwitt Savage really is being more annoying and talking more bollocks then i thought was possible even for him. There is no beginning to his talents. He's a journey man ex footballer who gives no insight to the game at all. By far the worst pundit Jamie Rednapp runner up and the bronze goes to Steve Claridge who sounds a bit like Bernard Bresslaw.

Job done you could bet your house on a 0-0 when the team was announced. Step nearer to the title and a potential huge piss up next Saturday i can't wait.

This all stemmed from Alex saying we are not winning by the odd goal in games when clearly we are. It would be pretty churlish to argue with any win regardless of how a game pans out. But the fact is winning and playing negative football the ends justify the means but next season questions will be asked if we play negative football and lose.

The point is Alex said he'd be worried if we were only beating teams by the odd goal and that's exactly what we are doing. We played West Ham on the fourth of March they might have had an outside chance of the Europa League then but the Champions League that's laughable. I've got a couple of West Ham mates and not once did they mention making the Champions League. You don't think Remy's goal against Hull wasn't a gift to cancel out Courtois one?. (Sorry fucked up the editing this is a reply to Curly)

But that's exactly what we've been doing.2-1 against Stoke, 3-2 against Hull, 1-0 against West Ham, 2-1 against Villa, 1-0 against QPR 2-1 at the Bridge , 2-1 against Palace , 2-1 against the might of Shrewsbury, 1-1 against Burnley. We've hardly been putting these so called lesser clubs to the sword have we?

I couldn't give a fuck about Real squire. The mighty Real Murcia now that's a different matter.

What would be scarier if Real didn't thrash the mighty Ponferrarina (Who?) Athletic (not a clue) Real Murcia (no idea) Almeria (is that a make of car?) Racing Santander (team of bankers?)

https://youtu.be/1La5s_CLLx8

I agree about what your saying that he's better then Livepool's strikers but i'm asking how he fails a medical and then has an injury prone season for us. In the space of a week how can you fail a stringent medical and then pass one seven days later. Mind you Liverpool have bought some proper pony players but surely they didn't pull the plug on the Remy deal to buy Ricky Lambert?. (Edit: It's Liverpool and Rodgers so maybe they did !)

Remy failed a medical at Liverpool and since he's been here he's been plagued by injuries. Hope it's just a coincidence or is he one of those players who to keep fully fit has to play regularly like he did at Q.P.R and Newcastle. I'll grab someone's hand off for a point tomorrow especially if Drogba starts.

I'd try the Goose on the North End Road one of the cheaper pubs in the area

Torres was a terrible buy there's no getting away from it. But in his defence he made his debut against Liverpool and should never have started that game. It can't have been easy for him leaving the scousers for 50 million on Thursday and playing against them a couple of days later. His confidence was shot from day 1 and he never recovered.

José Mourinho, the anti-Barcelona, stands alone in modern footballThe Chelsea manager is close to seeing his team win the Premier League but of everyone involved in the Barça team in the 1990s, from Pep Guardiola to Julen Lopetegui, he is the outcast who now revels in his role as the dark lord • Sid Lowe: Barça’s philosophy makes them coaching incubator for top clubs A Barcelona fan with a cardboard mask of José Mourinho. Photograph: Jasper Juinen/Getty ImagesJonathan Wilson Thursday 23 April 201512.20 BST Last modified on Thursday 23 April 201512.48 BST Modern football was invented in Barcelona in the mid-90s. Of this season’s Champions League quarter-finalists, four sides are managed by players who turned out for Barça in 1996: Pep Guardiola, Luis Enrique, Julen Lopetegui and Laurent Blanc. Within a couple of years, they had been joined by Frank de Boer and Phillip Cocu as well as the coach Louis van Gaal and his assistant Ronald Koeman. In slightly differing ways, the eight are apostles for the Barcelona way – or, more accurately, given the influence of Ajax on that style, the Barçajax way. However, there was another presence there, initially as a translator and then as a coach. In the Barçocracy of modern football, there is a fallen angel. In the modern world, at least at elite level, José Mourinho stands alone. At the greatest coaching seminar the world has seen, when the game as we know it was shaped, but he did not draw the same lessons everybody else did. The other eight espoused the proactive, possession-based football seeded at the club by Vic Buckingham, developed by Rinus Michels and taken to new levels by Johan Cruyff. Mourinho, however, was different. Mourinho believed in reactive football. He was the outsider, the outcast who now revels in his role as the dark lord. Saturday’s game against Manchester United was typical. Others, playing at home in a match that could effectively ensure the title, might have felt compelled to attack. Mourinho fielded Kurt Zouma, a central defender, in midfield, sitting deep and won the game with 28% possession. Mourinho may have objected to Diego Torres’s biography of him but the passage describing his methods against the better sides was as true of Saturday’s win as it was of the victory over Liverpool that determined the destination of the title last season: 1. The game is won by the team who commits fewer errors. 2. Football favours whoever provokes more errors in the opposition. 3. Away from home, instead of trying to be superior to the opposition, it’s better to encourage their mistakes. 4. Whoever has the ball is more likely to make a mistake. 5. Whoever renounces possession reduces the possibility of making a mistake. 6. Whoever has the ball has fear. 7. Whoever does not have it is thereby stronger. It’s true that earlier in the season, Chelsea were more expansive. When Diego Costa, Cesc Fábregas and Nemanja Matic were fit and in form, they attacked and racked up goals. The talk was all of how, after the regular failures to break down massed defences last season, Mourinho had taken decisive action. As the squad has tired and form has waned, as the finish line has approached, though, he has reverted to type. Chelsea have been struggling for form and consistency all year and yet, in the 12 league games since the 5-3 defeat by Tottenham on New Year’s Day, they have conceded only seven goals and dropped only six points. There was a concern earlier this season that Mourinho might be losing his touch. Against Manchester City (home and away), United (away), Southampton (away) and PSG (home and away), Chelsea took the lead, sat back and ended up conceding equalisers. It could even have happened on Saturday, Falcao hitting the post with 11 minutes remaining. However, even if Chelsea have been unusually vulnerable at times in a lead this season, Mourinho hasn’t changed – and it could be argued that Saturday was vindication. FacebookTwitterPinterest From right to left, the then Barcelona manager Louis van Gaal, assistant coach Ronald Koeman, keepers’ trainer Frans Hoek and assistant trainer José Mourinho during a friendly in Amsterdam in 1999. Photograph: VI-Images/VI-Images via Getty ImagesAnyway, the sense is that it’s not entirely a matter of utility: Mourinho has his sides play that way because he enjoys it. Cast out from Barcelona, overlooked by them when they appointed Pep Guardiola in 2008, he is now the anti-Barcelona, determined, like Milton’s Satan that, “glory never shall his wrath or might; extort from me,” vowing “To wage by force of guile eternal war, irreconcilable to our grand Foe.” Every defensive performance, every win with limited possession, is a blow against Barça. There’s probably no game Mourinho has enjoyed so much as Internazionale’s Champions League semi-final second leg at the Camp Nou in 2010, when his side, down to 10 men for more than an hour, had only 19% possession and lost 1-0 to win 3-2 on aggregate. Who needs the ball? Mourinho is not a pragmatist in the way that, say, Fabio Capello is, changing approach according to his players and, where necessary, adopting reactive, defensive tactics. Rather his preferred way of playing is reactive, which is why he sold Juan Mata. He may have been Chelsea’s player of the season in each of the two previous years but he had no place in Mourinho’s conception of football. The paradox is that if Mourinho really has allowed his philosophy to be defined in opposition to Barcelona – he is that which they are not – then he is still allowing Barcelona to dictate terms, creating a dichotomy where there could be multiplicity. It is not that there is the Barçajax school and Not-the-Barçajax school; it is that the Barçajax school is one way of playing among an almost infinite variety, as represented by Jürgen Klopp, Carlo Ancelotti and Diego Simeone among others. And that, of course, is testimony to the astonishing influence of Barcelona over modern football. Mourinho cannot escape his upbringing as a coach; even as a rebel, it is Barcelona he is rebelling against

I'd be concerned if any of Putin's mates rang up Roman and said '' Fancy meeting up for a cup of tea?''.