CHELSEA FC PUB CLUBHOUSE OF KEVIN ARNOLD ASHBURNER

[We Hate Scouse 10,261]

I am taking the piss. remember what I said on page three of this thread #41 wher I say do not take my posts seriously. I just like taking the piss. I do not mean anything I say. I just like making conversations up for the fun of it.

You had me worried there dude. God you're so funny! I love you so much. BFFL?

[Peppen 934]

I am taking the piss. remember what I said on page three of this thread #41 wher I say do not take my posts seriously. I just like taking the piss. I do not mean anything I say. I just like making conversations up for the fun of it.

Kevin, do you still have that Woody Allen shaped dildo kept away in your cupboards? That thing brought such wonderful memories of joy.

[Stingray 9,441]

I am taking the piss. remember what I said on page three of this thread #41 wher I say do not take my posts seriously. I just like taking the piss. I do not mean anything I say. I just like making conversations up for the fun of it.

WEAK EARTHLING !!

[We Hate Scouse 10,261]

Kevin, do you still have that Woody Allen shaped dildo kept away in your cupboards? That thing brought such wonderful memories of joy.

Not to those poor midgets it didn't!!

[We Hate Scouse 10,261]

WEAK EARTHLING !!

That's one of the girls that KEVIN WOODFURNACE is going to teleport to see in the locker room all sweaty and lick her unshaven armpits. Oh yummy.

[Peppen 934]

Not to those poor midgets it didn't!!

They will never be forgotten - #Pray4Midgets #Sacrificed2satisfyKevin

[Stingray 9,441]

That's one of the girls that KEVIN WOODFURNACE is going to teleport to see in the locker room all sweaty and lick her unshaven armpits. Oh yummy.

I bet KEVIN ASSBURNER WANTS THEM N THEIR PERIOD, BECAUSE ....

[KevinAshburner 1,270]

YOU GUYS ARE POSTING TO QUICKLY AND TOO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME. I CAN'T KEEP UP AND YOU ARE GOING TO CRASH THE FORUM BY POSTING TO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME.

YOU GUYS ARE TO EASY TO CONTROL AND MANIPULATE. I JUST POST SOMETHING AND YOU ALL GO CRAZY ALL OVER IT.

I POSTED ONE THING AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING POSTING CRAZY WITH SO MUCH STUFF.

[We Hate Scouse 10,261]

YOU GUYS ARE POSTING TO QUICKLY AND TOO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME. I CAN'T KEEP UP AND YOU ARE GOING TO CRASH THE FORUM BY POSTING TO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME.

YOU GUYS ARE TO EASY TO CONTROL AND MANIPULATE. I JUST POST SOMETHING AND YOU ALL GO CRAZY ALL OVER IT.

I POSTED ONE THING AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING POSTING CRAZY WITH SO MUCH STUFF.

Fuck! You got us. You're so Illuminati you don't even know it!

[Stingray 9,441]

YOU GUYS ARE POSTING TO QUICKLY AND TOO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME. I CAN'T KEEP UP AND YOU ARE GOING TO CRASH THE FORUM BY POSTING TO MUCH IN A SHORT SPACE OF TIME.

YOU GUYS ARE TO EASY TO CONTROL AND MANIPULATE. I JUST POST SOMETHING AND YOU ALL GO CRAZY ALL OVER IT.

I POSTED ONE THING AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING POSTING CRAZY WITH SO MUCH STUFF.

Impossible. We just think much faster than you.

[Stingray 9,441]

I LOVE YOU KEVIN ASSBURNER!!!

[Peppen 934]

KEVIN ASHBURNER DAILY REPORT 15TH OF MARCH - CONDUCTED BY ILLUMINATI LEADER OF SURVEILLANCE OPERATIONS PEPPEN:

03:22 am: Kevin is breathing heavily. He is having a nightmare about the Illuminati invading earth the 21st of December 2014. I laugh at the fact he is off by 2 days.

05:58 am: Kevin wakes up, and notices his morning wood. A mighty, yet humble sign of manliness. He proceeds to access his phone to satisfy his needs through pornographic entertainment: "MIDGETS AND BIG BOOTY VOL. 22".

06:31 am: Kevin eats breakfast. Oatmeal, which is strange, since our data clearly shows that Kevin does not like oatmeal. He apparently DOES like oatmeal. Noted and archived under "SECTION 334 B - STUFF KEVIN LIKES".

09:45 am: Nothing of interest, to be honest. Kevin is doing his usual Internet research about us, and although finding completely reliable sources such as the online article: "ILLUMINATI IS LIKE THE REAL DEAL SUCKAS" it is of little significance since Kevin already is the chosen one, and has divine knowledge in abundance.

11:00 am: Kevin watches part two of "MIDGETS AND BIG BOOTY VOL. 22".

12:14 pm: Ashburner has lunch. He notices our cameras whilst enjoying his cheese and pork sandwich.

03:08 pm: Porn..... Again. Part 3. How many parts are there?

05:55 pm: I leave the office and prepare for the wonderful festival coming up soon. How the hell will I beat WHS and Stingray, they were an amazing couple last year. Fuckers.

[Melanicus 5,208]

That's one of the girls that KEVIN WOODFURNACE is going to teleport to see in the locker room all sweaty and lick her unshaven armpits. Oh yummy.

Man, seriously, what the fuck?

[Stingray 9,441]

FOR THE ASSBURNER!!!

[We Hate Scouse 10,261]

Man, seriously, what the fuck?

KEVIN WOODFURNACES fantasy man. Don't blame me.

[KevinAshburner 1,270]

carry on guys. I am enjoying the entertainment you are giving me.

[Stingray 9,441]

Man, seriously, what the fuck?

[Stingray 9,441]

carry on guys. I am enjoying the entertainment you are giving me.

WHAT IS YOUR FETISH ASSBURNER???