Leif

Lukaku, Lukaku, for where are thout Lukaku..or however that shitty line is spelled.

GRRRRRRR RAAAAOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRR. KAKUTA, JUST WHYYYY!!?!?!?!?!?!? ARE YOU TRYING TO HURT ME!? STOP IT!!!!!

Watching Kakuta is hurting my penis. Whenever I see Hazard, I'm hard as a rock; but Kakuta's, well, 'meh' passes keeps making me flaccid. THERE'S ONLY SO MUCH I CAN HANDLE!

Mwah ha ha. :D

LUIZ, U AINT FUCKING MESSI.

Mikel has been so fucking infuriating IMO so far this pre-season. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO FUCKING TACKLE. I DON'T CARE IF YOU STARTED OUT IN A MORE ADVANCED ROLE. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WIN BACK POSSESSION NOW.

Kakuta off please. Put De Bruyne on the right. Marin on for Kakuta and put him on the left.

I'd enjoy this game more if we tried getting the ball back.

LET'S DESTROY THE SNAIL EATING KARNTSSSSSS! (No offence to the lovely Frenchman on here. Actually, are PSG even French anymore anyway?)

I actually think this would be a good match for Benayoun. This is pre-season after all, so it is in part about experimenting, right? So why not chuck Hazard on the right wing, De Bruyne on the left (may as well try him there again. Marin could play the 2nd half), with Benayoun behind Lukaku? No one can deny that Benayoun was great when used properly at Arsenal!

Easily my favourite striker in the world right now. He's the kind of player who can play in any team, any system, any league, and still be one of the most prolific guys around. (Well, that's an assumption since he's not played in that many leagues!)

If Torres will "come good" as you say, why would you want Van Persie too next season?

So - this'll be my first game on this forum where I'm not completely drained and half-asleep (Seattle W.) Prepare for some words + language you've never heard before if we score/concede, even though this is pre-season. Apologies in advance.

Juventus vs. Inter Milan is on right now. It's an extremely complicated set-up, where the winner faces AC Milan later on, and then the loser faces AC Milan even later on after that or something. No idea really. Enjoyable game though. It's basically Juventus' reserve players vs. most of Inter's main players. Lucio (recently left Inter for Juve) had a little blunder (I assume it was a parting gift) allowing Inter's Coutinho to score. It's around 20 minutes in. 1-0 to Inter Milan.

I think that's actually exactly what I'd pick too. Good choices.

MATA IS SPECIAL GOD DAMMIT!

Good feedback can be given here too, right? Short and sweet - this is now my favourite website online. My post count doesn't really show how much time I spend on here. I doubt an hour goes by where I'm awake and not checking this site. LOVE YOU GUYS XOXOXOX. (OK, perhaps the last bit was a bit too far.)

Oh by the way - I never realised Hazard had so much pace! I feel he'd be much better on the wing, but unfortunately, I feel Mata will be placed on the wing with Hazard central to keep him happy. I also believe Mata's a better passer, while Hazard's the better dribbler. Hopefully RDM does what's right.

Currently re-watching the game. I'm concerned about the lack of play through the middle. Hazard was certainly not on the ball enough. We also barely pressed, and instead of making tackles, usually waited for them to make an iffy pass. Impressed by Benayoun when central, and if Marin had more composure and less selfishness in the match, he may have been my MOTM. Mikel my Flop Of The Match.

This sexy mofo of ours is playing tonight for Vitesse I assume in their Europa League qualifying game or something. No idea when kick-off is.

Tbh, people can try and put a negative spin on that game, but the fact is, in just one game, we've outscored both Manchester clubs in pre-season and they've been against clubs no one has ever heard of (Manchester City even lost to one of them.) Seattle W. are no pushovers. They're currently going through their normal season so had all the hunger to win - our players didn't even take the game that seriously yet still won. We've scored more than Tottenham + Arsenal combined also - and that's us playing without the likes of Terry, Torres, an actual left-back, Cech, etc. I think it was a good game. I'm glad it's given Marin + Hazard the chance to try and understand eachother's game.

Currently drinking anything with caffeine in it and eating anything with bad sugar in it to try and keep me up. Also just trying to pass the time by watching this guy's entertaining vids:

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It's quite odd that I'm more excited by this signing than Hazard's considering I've no idea how he'll even fit in, but like I've said many times, although players like Hazard have extraordinary talent, Oscar definitely has *it*. I've got butterflies in my stomach now. Haven't had these since I fancied some girl in high school years ago!

Liverpool for being the greatest team of all time. They're simply the model club which all others should follow. They have possibly the greatest midfielder of all time in Steven Gerrard, and only haven't won the Premier League due to the likes of us and Manchester United being corrupt. Their fans are polite, well behaved, and never abusive. They are based in a stunning location, and are simply the definition of "football".