Pizy

Oh, get the fuck up you time wasting cunt.

Never mind scoring goals, we don’t even scare opposition keepers. This is turgid stuff.

Havertz just totally useless. My god.

We’ve looked like late stage Mourinho’s Chelsea before he got sacked again. It feels like we don’t even work on attacking patterns in training. Everyone looks like they’re just told to run around and improvise.

Jorginho is a traffic cone defensively. Anyone turns us over and he is literally standing totally still and can’t move. We may seriously need to panic buy a midfielder this week or else Tuchel may not last the bloody season.

Fuck off. This team is woeful. Fucking embarrassing effort all over the pitch. Jorginho is fucking horrible. There is no planet that they deserve this lead but we’re so fucking terrible that we’ve gifted more goals.

We’re a team transformed with Kova and Kante + a proper striker. We’re dead with this current iteration. No midfield, no goal threat from Kai or Mase in current form.

We’re dreadful at dealing with all set pieces. Corners, long throws, free kicks. It’s a desperate scramble almost every time. Our midfield has also AGAIN been nonexistent. Not getting on the ball and dictating things at all. We desperately need Kova and Kante back.

Get the ball, give it away. Get the ball, give it away. Over and over.

I’m 100% expecting a weird, much changed XI. Maybe we’ll catch Southampton off guard.

Going to have to be another tedious grind of a match most likely if one of our best attackers in Reece is out. We desperately need one or more of our attackers other than Sterling to step the fuck up finally.

Are we seriously going to wait until literally the last minute to do things? The other clubs aren’t going to want to sell key players with no time to sign replacements. And Fofana has been having a medical since Sunday morning, ffs

With 4 attackers going and Tuchel not really fancying Pulisic (or Broja, really) that much, I wonder if it’s possible we sign BOTH Auba and Zaha. Though perhaps this new ownership won’t want to add two more 30 year old players when youth has been such a focus.

Fofana doing the world’s longest medical? Let’s get an announcement today, damnit!

Long since time to let the De Jong dream die, dude. It ain’t happening.

Now the report is that Ziyech will not only just be going to Ajax on loan, but that WE will be paying some of his wages. Wtf kind of terrible deal is that!? A new attacker is surely sealed now if we’ve let 4 attackers leave (Lukaku, Werner, CHO, Ziyech).

Man, Ajax have made like 200m in sales this summer but are crying poor when it comes to buying Ziyech back for 30m?

Probably didn’t want to pay a fee on top of his likely very hefty wages.

You know what would be nice? Our first stress free, straight forward, comfortable win of the season so far. Unfortunately, I can’t see it. Injuries, suspensions, and stopgap solutions in key areas of the XI will probably mean another stressful match. I didn’t watch their game against United but apparently they were pretty decent despite losing. Maybe Kai and Mase will finally wake up tomorrow?

Tbf, there are cases where there’s a doctor here that’s the best in the world at specific surgeries or procedures and I’ve heard of several cases where a European footballer comes over here for said doctors. But that’s usually for the actual surgery rather than a standard medical that’s usually a formality. I’m crossing my fingers that this is simply Boehly being ultra thorough with a massively expensive signing. But it seems like kind of a drastic step.

Can’t even imagine what happens if Fofana fails the medical after all this effort to get him. It’s strange that there isn’t a renowned doctor anywhere in the UK or Europe that could’ve looked him over and he had to travel all the way over here to the States. Makes me think the worst. That something was spotted over the weekend in his medical and Boehly is now sending him to America to get a second opinion.

Premier League club to Premier League club tax.

Not signing a forward player now would almost undue all the great work we’ve done in the window this summer.

Christ, so another game with players out of position then. Was hoping Fofana would be wrapped up today and thrown straight in like Cucu was for tomorrows match. The Auba news is interesting. Would explain why it’s been dragging on for weeks now when you’d think it would be a pretty straightforward deal.

Everything you’ve said here is a matter of debate but….did you say he looks small? Huh? And not assured on the ball? I feel like we’ve watched different players. He’s 6’3” and his comfort on the ball is one of the things I’m most excited about.