Elliott

Could also be Millwall...

Oh yeah I see them now. I didn't know Reading was associated with biscuits.

What biscuits? And I suspect the 13 is the logo of whoever made the picture, given that there is a Scandinavian language written underneath it.

Ahhh, I wondered what that was! Nice one Alex. Also, the wallpaper border must be something, but the picture is too small to work it out.

Milan's point I think was that if we'd kept Johnson then eventually we could field this all English defence, perhaps next season. And personally I think that Mancienne is capable enough to play in our team, although not sure Johnson is better than Bosingwa.

Ashley Cole, Glen Johnson, John Terry and Michael Mancienne All English defence.

He wasn't brilliant, but he was only young and a good prospect. He was never good enough to remain at the club if he wanted regular first team football, but it's good to see him do well. Even if he does steal toilet seats.

Liverpool winning it would be a national tragedy.

Means we'll end up using Belletti and Kalou on the wings beside Drogba, not ideal. I guess Quaresma will play against Newcastle and Bolton, well I would hope so anyway.

That article was fucking hilarious and I love the way Jeremy Clarkson writes. I've got one of his books and I love it, gotta get the others too. After the game I was taken to the Chelsea dressing room so that I could admire all the players’ penises – many were very enormous indeed. Then you have the Charlton fans who travelled down the M4 to Reading recently and, having failed to think of any suitable abuse, came up with: “What’s it like to live in Wales?” I also like how he noticed so quickly the subtle skills of the midfielder, which are perhaps less obvious than a winger being able to cross and a striker being able to shoot.

Addicks = Charlton Athletic Poster = Portsmouth Electric Bolt On sticker = Bolton Wanderers Pot being made = Stoke City Black Cats = Sunderland Ley with fire round it = Burnley Saints pictures= Southampton Boys with Tractors = Ipswich Town Shiny castle = Newcastle United Gun on TV = Arsenal QPR written on TV = Queens Park Rangers Wolves on TV = Wolverhampton Wanderers Mannequin heads with hats = Luton Town and Stockport County Foxes on vase = Leicester City White lilys = Tottenham Hotspur and Preston North End Seagulls = Brighton and Hove Albion Bowl of Toffees = Everton Tigers on Boys' t-shirts = Hull City Blue birds = Cardiff City Red Devils on Toffee Bowl = Manchester United (could also be Lincoln City if they are imps) Pirate Swords = Bristol Rovers or Sheffield United Cottage on Hill = Fulham Anything blue = Chelsea and Birmingham City Canaries on curtain rail = Norwich City Blue sky = Manchester City and Coventry City Seaside picture = Blackpool? Line of people in white (pilgrims) = Plymouth Argyle Owl = Sheffield Wednesday Magpies = Newcastle United (again) Paddling Pool = Hartlepool United Toy Train = Crewe Alexandra Women hammering = West Ham United Not got all of them, but must be most of them.

English Catholics Your stereotype was destroyed by your own example... But back in the times when that film was set, things were a lot more cut and dried because religions were a legal issue. A country had to be a certain religion in many cases.

No, I disagree. I think forcing a young girl to marry some guy she doesn't know, so that the family may keep their snooty upper class status is tantamount to slavery and shows a complete lack of rights for the female population. By all means practise this barbaric act in muslim countries, but here, we aren't going to agree with it and we really need to stamp it out. Not least because it usually comes along with physical threats and many women have been brutally murdered by their own family for refusing to follow the request. What is right about that?

Catholics practice their religion as per the Pope sitting in the Vatican in Rome. Protestants formed as people began to disagree with Catholic policies and what not. They both follow the Bible, but interpret it in different ways and have derived different rules of life from it. And to say that all people in England are protestant and all people in Spanish are catholic is a ridiculous stereotype. For sure there are catholics in England, that's how we still have an Archbishop of Canterbury and other places. And then you forget about the large contingent of atheists, and all the muslims, jews, hindus, buddhists and other religions. It will be the same for Spain.

Sounds like we bottled it. Third place it is then.

I did.

For fuck's sake, how boring. I wrote to UEFA: Dear UEFA In light of today's UEFA Champions League Quarter Final and Semi Final draw, I am writing to ask you to please stop pairing Liverpool and Chelsea together. You may think fixing the matches in this way is entertaining, but the fact of the matter is, fans of both clubs are quite bored of this annoying match-up, and would have both rather played any other team in the draw. Please take note for future draws. If you're going to fix it, fix it entertainingly. Yours sincerely, Elliott Stephenson

By all means, practice your religion, eat the food you eat and whatever else. But if it breaks our laws, like pre-arranged marriages, well then you're going to have to face the music.

"What? Don't all men lock their daughters in their basements and have sex with them? No? Seriously?... Shit"

Damn straight.

Francesc Fabregas Emmanuel Eboue William Gallas Do you sense a pattern? Jamie Carragher Joey Barton Robbie Savage Cristiano Ronaldo

Joe seems like a bloke you could hang out with, and JT, not sure about Lamps though. Cech I reckon too.

This is a joke right? It seems way too fucking good to be true!

I don't see any reason why not, if you can get people involved!

We tried to get him, we didn't, we got Bosingwa a year later, move on.