Sorry for an off topic, but I had to when you mentioned diving I saw Cristiano Ronaldo in town today. I said, "Can you sign my shirt?" He said, "Have you got a pen?" I said, "Oh no. Hang on." With that I threw myself on the floor, rolled over theatrically and began to cry. He said, "How's that going to get a pen?" I said, "Well that's how you fucking do it."