Eidur the Spider

Can't see this happening too, mind you if it did I'd jizz everywhere, fair warning lads.

He just mentioned focusing on getting our 'targets', usual non-committal waffle.

RLC so laid-back he should be in a bloody coma. How about you work your ass off and prove yourself to the new boss?

I'd love to see 2 up top this season.

Get Kante on

Paddy Power 3 mins · Chelsea have confirmed the signing of N'Golo Kante, who has just arrived at Stamford Bridge on foot, having run the 113 miles from Leicester.

HE'S OURS! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!

This is an unbelievable piece of business from the club. He was phenomenal last season, I watched a lot of Leicester games like we all did and he always stood out, great energy, sound tackler, everything our midfield lacked last season. Over the moon with this.

Come home from a tiring ass week at work to see Kante is coming! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YEAAAH!

If this is true and we get him, I'll be over the fecking moon!

Antonio Conte when he turns up to training and sees Marko Marin still plays for us...

Transfer tactic, just forcing our hand to pay up.

I work in a dementia care home and have done for the past 6 years, it's not a surprise to me at all that he's getting a response to the Chelsea/Leeds game, if you imagine memories as a bookshelf, when something like dementia shakes it, the top level (the most recent memories) are lost easily but the ones from years ago stick around.

If we are playing with two up top does this deal necessarily mean Costa has to leave? I know there's a lot of money in the Michy and possible Morata deals but with those three strikers rotating, and with Michy in particular still young and developing, we could easily use all three of them throughout the season. I'm wondering if we will fund the other positions we need to strengthen (CM and DF) by letting go of some attacking midfield options and CM's. Mikel looks likely to go, Matic I would keep but I honestly think there's a chance we could cash in on someone like Oscar, a lot has been made in the press of Conte's desire to work with him but if the price is right and it means getting in Koulibaly and a Kante type midfielder, I think it's a sacrifice he'd be willing to make. Particularly if say, Cuadrado is coming back. I know there's a lot of 'ifs and buts' in this, but having these three doesn't necessarily mean offloading Costa. I don't think it means sacrificing strengthening other areas either.

Exactly! No one else seems to give a crap. Buy! Buy! Buy!

Trying...not....to get......excited.....

In addition to Cuadrado, #Juventus also asked about Matic, a player #CFC paid €25m to acquire from Benfica. (via @DavidAmoyal / @DiMarzio) But Conte has taken midfielder Matic off the market, #Juventus will keep trying but it will be difficult (via @DavidAmoyal /@DiMarzio) #CFC

Chelsea are trying to hijack Everton’s move for £28million Axel Witsel. #CFC #EFC #Zenit (Sun) Chelsea are in pole position to sign Belgium star Axel Witsel as Blues all but agree terms with Everton target’s agents. #CFC #EFC (Sun) Chelsea have all but agreed terms with Witsel’s agents and now have to agree a fee with #Zenit St Petersburg. #CFC (Sun) Everton thought they had sealed the deal before Conte weighed in — and Witsel is very keen on a Stamford Bridge switch. #CFC #EFC (Sun) #Zenit would normally expect at least £50m for a player of Witsel's calibre but he has just 12 months left on his deal. #CFC #EFC (Sun)

Dan Levene ‏@danlevene 16m Jose's 49 academy players promoted to the first team includes ones he let ride in the front seat on the coach to the game, right?

Already with the dig at Wenger, I have to admit I did have a big belly laugh at that. It's going to be really fascinating to see Mourinho's antics as an outsider. I went into this press conference thinking 'Oh shit, this is gonna be depressing to watch', then I tuned in and I actually......didn't really care. All of last seasons antics came to mind and I thought 'Ah well, better to have Conte coming in than all that trouble'. That felt good. I won't say I'll enjoy his antics, I'm quite sure he could piss me off if he has digs at us and nit picks decisions in our games against United, but I'm relieved that I don't care as much as I thought.

Michy, Costa and Pelle would be a pretty solid striking option. Throw Traore in there as well.

Conte would like to bring Graziono Pelle with him and Chelsea will formulate the first offer this week. (via @DiMarzio) #CFC #saintsfc Business has just picked up.

This wins the internet today!

xTuukkazz ‏@xTuukkazz 32m #WelcomeMichy Welcome to the kings of London! btw @mbatshuayi could you post us a video which teach us to pronounce your name. Michy BatshuayiVerified account‏@mbatshuayi sure mate @xTuukkazz you say "Bat-shoe-ah-yi" or listen in Fifa "BATSHUAYI! FOR THE GOAL!!" hahaha Helping with pronouncing his name already. Love it haha!