Me vs a United fan I know

[chrismada9 1,948]

You've probrably seen it on facebook already, but just in case you don't have facebook, I'll put it up on here. Here's how I attempted to battle it out with a United fan I know from uni

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Zain (United Fan): why you celebrating 2nd? do you also celebrate when you come second in a match????!!

Me: What are you on about Zain??? We're not just celebrating 2nd, Hiddink is turning our season around, and he's made a great start!

Zain: Nothing to turn around mate nor has there ever been since mourinho left even avram did a stand up job, scolari is an awesome manager how are cheski gonna find any1 manager? dont think Alex Ferguson wants the job nor Arsène Wenger!!! Even roman abramovichmoney cant buy JESUS!

Me: There is something to turn around, we were fourth and looking at 5th place, but Hiddink after 2 games has lifted us 2 places, so how can you tell me that isn't progress. Yes Scolari is a great manager, but he just didn't do well for us. Hiddink has come in, and Chelsea look so much better!! Who the fuck needs Fergie or Wenger mate??

Zain: we're 1st plus not to brag but europe..hell world champions!...erm i finks every1 needs sir alex fergie (MBE OBE)!!!!

what are you talking about 5th!! hindink didnt do fuck! the only reason your 2nd is because LPOOL slipped up last week and this week!!! lamps saved the day otherwise Chelsea would have fired another manager!

cheski are stupid and impatient! you dont build a world class team with money alone and it dont happen overnight!

Me: What?? Fire a manager because of ONE game?? Seriously man, come on!! And what do you mean Hiddink hasn't done fuck?? If he hadn't have arrived then we wouldn't have beaten an on form Aston Villa, or beaten a team like Juventus at home, and keep a clean sheet, when everyone else has scored against us. Obviously there's been a lot of improvement in the last couple of games. The best is yet to come.

LOL!! Fergie can take his MBE and shove it up his anal passage mate! x)

Zain: hahahah your jus jealous!!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alex_Ferguson - read it, hey frame it and hang it above your bed and everyday you wake up for the rest of your life know that you'll neva have a manager that good ;-)

serously though im only mess i love Chelsea..like i love a good kick in the privates! heheh nah they've got to stop firing they're managers every weekend and give the manager some time and support. roman A-BUM-avich is a loser get hm gone and that traitor Peter Kenyon.

im off to polish off me replica 07-08 trophies!!!

Me: there's no point in feeling jealous mate!! Win or lose, you gotta stand behind your team

Sorry mate, but I don't have room on my wall for that, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jose_Mourinho - I've already got this mounted quite nicely on my wall, nicely framed, and I always wake up knowing that he's seen a Chelsea side trounce you 3-1 at Old Trafford while we had a league title in the bag.

Now go and polish those trophies nicely for Terry and Lampard!! ;P

Zain: you got any cleaning tips for me mate i cant seem to get TERRYS TEARS off this champs league trophy!!!

you can keep the 3-1 victory with title in the bag i raise you one fateful evening on the 21st of May

(shows off his photographic evidence)

Me: here's a tip for you. When Inter score two away goals at old trafford, wipe the tears off Ronaldo's face and use that to polish them off. Mind you it won't really matter anyway because Terry can always wash it off with the Champagne once he gets his hands on it

Zain: ouch bro that was low blow wishing my team bad luck in such a harsh way im hurt man, you've not got a soul!

giggs should in a retirement home and he still better than most of your squad! terrys not good enuff to clean sir giggys boots! beside terry cant touch ronaldo on the pitch let alone grab tears from his face! ronnys too fast he'd leave poor ol tezza in the dust. i wasnt gonna post this but your low blow has forced my hand.

those tears are a nightmare to get off man, i've tried everything! turtle wax, brasso, t-cut, BLEECH, white spirit you name it! dam terry whyd you hav to cry like a lil bitch!

Me: seriously man you don't get it do you!! The only way you're going to get rid of them are Ronaldo's tears, don't worry mate, you'll get a whole dose of them when you lose to Inter in 2 weeks.

Ronny is fast I'll agree on that, but he is probably the world's greatest at being a diving cheating cnut! xD

Zain:truth is its nt all abt fergy he was about to be fired when he first became manager at utd when he couldn't win the league oh the irony! the fans wanted him gone! you've got to give the manger time though and look at him now! most decorated manager in the biz..more decorations that my Christmas tree...i dont have a xmas tree but if i did he'd still have more decorations

Ronaldo is a flawed genius. you'll note 24 seconds into this video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbEe5ld6TSA...feature=related

when hes not rolling around on the floor he can score beauties like that.

i leave you with this quote:

"I am no longer Chelsea coach, and I do not have to defend them any more, but I think it is correct if I say Drogba is a diver. " - the late great JOSE Mourinho

Me: Flawed Genius eh?? HA!! If that's the case then, he's probably also too big for his boots, he thinks he can do all these fancy moves on the pitch with his feet, but then he makes a complete mockery and makes himself look like an idiot.. observe ..

:lol:

[terry26 6]

um the late great Jose ????????? he's not dead

Zain: we're 1st plus not to brag

oh please i have not yet met a United fan whos allergic to bragging

[Fulham Broadway 16,411]

Hes a bit of a tit, this Zain isn't he ? His command of English leaves a lot to be desired as well. No wonder immigrants flock to the UK, he hardly offers any competition. He would have difficulty filling in a benefits form, though he's probably still at school to be fair....

[blue_army 2]

my conversations when united fans start bragging normally go , have you actually been to old trafford?, do you even know where manchester is? united fan: but we won the champion league, me: yes maybe but where were you i was in moscow as im not a plastic glory hunter come back to me when you can call yourself a proper fan. They normally shut up very quickly then. LOL

[diskoviolente 425]

sadly enough i only know these die hard "being around even longer than furgie" manure-fans.

no sense in arguing at all

[BlueLion. 21,491]

I don't give a fuck about what fans of other clubs say. I know that I've been to more matches than anyone else in the school, so they can't say much.

[warnie_666 1,081]

EPL Telecast began in Asia in 99. The year when Man Utd won the treble. Most jumped onto the Man Utd band wagon after that. But they wont accept it. The weirdest story I heard from an Asian fan was that In 93, His brother used to send him Video Cassestes of Man Utd matches from England and watching that he became a fan of the club.

You need to tell THE ZAIN that man Utd will Perish once Alex leaves.

[Drogba11CFC 108]

I saw a special feature on MotD last year...Man Utd vs Arsenal in Bangkok. Guess who everyone supported.

It's oly a matter of time before South East Asia joins together to form Man Utd Land...

[warnie_666 1,081]

I saw a special feature on MotD last year...Man Utd vs Arsenal in Bangkok. Guess who everyone supported.

It's oly a matter of time before South East Asia joins together to form Man Utd Land...

Well, If we win 10 titles by 2022 South East Asia can be part of West London.

[misschief 24]

To be fair, when you've won as much as they have its probably hard not to brag about it. Dippers weren't any quieter in their day and I dare say if we were as successful there'd be a bit of boasting from us and all. Besides, the younger supporters have known so much success theyre spoilt enough to expect it - even after just two titles under Mourinho, how did our younger supporters feel to miss out? I remember hearing more than the odd tantrum.

Having said that, they are gonna be sooooooo fucked when Fergie does eventually hang up his hairdryer and as we all know - the bigger they are the harder they fall. We'll just have to soak it all up for now because it's just a matter of being patient.

[Laylabelle 9,303]

If Jose goes there hell they wont be fucked!!

Keane!They wanted Keane and he did a lovley job with Sunderland they can have him lol

[Manson17 0]

You need to tell THE ZAIN that man Utd will Perish once Alex leaves.

And Ronaldo 

Also, when I did look at Fergies wikipage... I found out his middle name is Chapman... That pretty much tells it all to me 

[misschief 24]

If Jose goes there hell they wont be fucked!!

Keane!They wanted Keane and he did a lovley job with Sunderland they can have him lol

If Jose goes there he'll win plenty of silverware for the first couple of seasons for sure but once he's sold of all their flair players and wound up the supporters with his defensive football, it'd do us a lot more favours than if it was Chelsea he'd come back to.

[.Cee 50]

And Ronaldo

Also, when I did look at Fergies wikipage... I found out his middle name is Chapman... That pretty much tells it all to me

So? I'm very sure his parents are VERY proud of their son's achievements. He's a legendary world-class manager. Silly statement IMO.

[Elliott 7]

So? I'm very sure his parents are VERY proud of their son's achievements. He's a legendary world-class manager. Silly statement IMO.

I'm totally confused by this. What has a middle name being chapman got to do with being proud of achievements? :S

[Manson17 0]

<br />I'm totally confused by this. What has a middle name being chapman got to do with being proud of achievements? :S<br />

<br /><br /><br />

I was thinking the same thing..