Vesper

let's win this Cup!!!!!

2020-21 English FA Cup, Final Chelsea Leicester City http://www.sportnews.to/mysports/2021/fa-cup-Chelsea-vs-leicester-city-s1/ https://www.totalsportek.com/page-3/

we all knew (insane IMHO) Kepa was starting but Alonso over Chilwell????? sigh

yes, fuck that supercomputer

Premier League – League Table – Predicted Final League Table https://www.footballwebpages.co.uk/premier-league/league-table/predicted

Asking if the FA Cup has lost its magic has lost its magic A ‘yarn bombing’ is seen in the village of Syston as support for Leicester before the FA Cup final. The Fiver still has no idea what a ‘yarn bombing’ is. Photograph: Matthew Lewis/Getty Images Barry Glendenning @bglendenning THE FINAL(S) COUNTDOWN Whisper it, but in recent years it hasn’t gone unnoticed that the FA Cup has lost its magic. So much so, in fact, that we’ve now reached the stage that not only has asking if the FA Cup has lost its magic lost its magic, but even asking if asking if the FA Cup has lost its magic has lost its magic. A once prestigious seasonal showpiece that used to grip a nation as tightly as Scrooge McDuck might clutch a bag of gold doubloons, the final has now fallen so far down the domestic pecking order that hoisting the famous old trophy is now considered far less impressive or important an achievement than finishing fourth in the league or having what looks on the face of it like a decent transfer window. FA Cup final and Premier League: 10 things to look out for this weekend Read more At the risk of sounding like a rheumy-eyed old man destined to forever shake a clenched fist at some clouds, back when The Fiver was a lad the FA Cup was a special standalone carnival of colour that marked the end of the season and was played in front of a packed Wembley. For a variety of reasons, ranging from general apathy, the greed of TV networks and the current apparently interminable Marie Celeste of a campaign, it has now sunk so low that Saturday’s final between Leicester and Chelsea doesn’t even mark the end of the day’s schedule of TV games. On the plus side, unlike the largely pointless three Premier League matches, the FA Cup final will at least be played out in front of a crowd. A total of 21,000 lucky fans will be allowed into Wembley, subject to the provision of individual negative lateral flow test results and compliance with the UK government’s Events Research Programme protocols. And to think just two longwinded paragraphs ago we were suggesting the occasion might have lost some of its romance. Meanwhile in Gothenburg, the players of Chelsea and Barcelona will contest the final of Women’s Big Cup on Sunday night, in a potential classic many enlightened gentlemen on the internet will take great glee in pointing out they wouldn’t bother watching if it was being played in the back garden that their bedroom in mum’s house overlooks. In the final for the first time and up against a team that has won all 26 of their league games this season, Chelsea are slight outsiders but their manager expects them to win. “I really respect Barcelona but I cannot wait to play them,” roared Emma Hayes. “It’s our time and there are so many players in that dressing room that can win the football match for us – we’ve seen it in recent weeks – the amount of players that have popped up all over the pitch to determine the outcome.” Insecure men tired of having women’s football “rammed down our throats” are advised to steer a wide berth of easily avoidable subscription channel BT Sport on Sunday night. LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE! Join Barry Glendenning from 8pm BST for hot Premier League MBM coverage of Newcastle 0-0 Manchester City. QUOTE OF THE DAY “If you had seen me as a player, what I did out of emotion it was insane … and I’m a completely normal guy” – in trying to play down some Sadio Mané handshake snub business, Jürgen Klopp reveals the current version of himself is shy and retiring compared to the Catherine Wheel of chaos he used to be. Snub! Photograph: Tom Jenkins/The Guardian ONE DOOR CLOSES … 16 December 2018: “Playing for Spain is out of the question. I’m fighting to play for France because I’m French. I don’t have dual citizenship and I’m not going to apply for it” – Aymeric Laporte says he will always fly the flag for France even if he’s never selected. 14 May 2021: “Aymeric Laporte is eligible to play for the representative teams of the RFEF Spanish Football Association with immediate effect” – a Fifa suit confirms that, having been granted dual citizenship by the Spanish government, the defender can switch flags in time for Euro Not 2020. FIVER LETTERS “I am surprised in all the accounts of match officials (Fiver letters passim) that no Bolton fans have written to praise the modesty of their former international Harold Hassall, who played in the Matthews final of 1953 and for England. His obituary in the Times recorded that in 1951 he went to see his first team, Astley and Tyldesley Collieries, play and was asked to act as a linesman. One of the players objected when Hassall gave him offside and alleged he had never played football. When Hassall said he had played the previous weekend and was asked by said player to name his opponents, he modestly and accurately replied: ‘Argentina’” – Richard Bullock. “I was managing an U-12 team, we were away from home and 8-0 down. From the sideline, before it got to double figures, I kept asking the ref: ‘Is it over yet?’ After another one of my pleas, this kid in the opposition midfield looked straight at me, then back to the game, won the ball, beat the midfield, left the defenders behind and scored the goal of the day. No celebration, he just ran over to me and said: ‘It is now.’ Long journey home” – Jim Duggan. “On the assumption that The Fiver is actually making tea in the kettle (Fiver letters passim), surely there is no reason for it to be tepid. It’s a kettle! It is specifically designed for warming liquids” – Mike Anthony. Send your letters to [email protected]. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’the day is … Richard Bullock. NEWS, BITS AND BOBS Gary Neville reckons it’s a damning indictment on the Glazers that Old Trafford resembled Strangeways before Manchester United’s ding-dong defeat by Liverpool. “What we’ve seen on that forecourt before is effectively Man Utd turned into a prison, it’s a devastating image,” he growled. EFL suits have lashed out at the Premier League’s new domestic TV deal, claiming it will perpetuate unfair parachute payments to relegated clubs and threaten the football pyramid. The Welsh government will allow 3,000 fans to attend Swansea’s Championship play-off semi-final home leg against Barnsley, with 900 at Newport for their League Two semi against Forest Green. It could be Frank Lampard’s Crystal Palace next season, but Mr Roy isn’t offering any clues. “I haven’t talked about retirement as yet,” he tooted. And following some fanciful boasts, you’ll be shocked to learn that Erik Alonso’s proposed takeover of Derby is as dead as his now deleted Social Media Disgrace Twitter account. STILL WANT MORE? “She has a skill you can’t buy”: a great read from Suzanne Wrack on the making of Chelsea boss Emma Hayes. Ooh, fancy design work and all. Illustration: Guardian Design / Ana Pradas/Chelsea FC/Getty Images, REX/Shutterstock, AP, Getty Images Just your 10 things to look out for in the Premier League and FA Cup final. Clickety click. How Atlético are being pushed towards La Liga glory by fans chanting in a car park. By Sid Lowe. The Pope’s Newc O’Rangers face Aberdeen at Ibrox hoping to complete an unbeaten domestic season on Saturday. Robin McKie recalls being at the fixture in 1968 when they attempted – and failed – to complete the feat. Trent Alexander-Arnold treating Old Trafford like his playground reminded us why we love football, coos Jonathan Liew. In an extract from a new book, Virgil van Dijk discusses Alisson’s “sick” saves, that Barcelona match and how playing football like Roger Federer plays tennis can mess with an opponent’s mind. Oh, and if it’s your thing … you can follow Big Website on Big Social FaceSpace. And INSTACHAT, TOO! ALL THE FIVER EVER WANTED AS A CHILD

Friday May 14 2021 Football Nerd Why Michail Antonio deserves more respect as a goalscorer By Daniel Zeqiri A turning point in David Moyes' time at West Ham was his decision to deploy Michail Antonio as a lone striker during Project Restart last year. Antonio had been moved around the pitch during his time at West Ham, viewed as a versatile forward who could unsettle defences by bringing an element of chaos. That does a disservice to the goal-scoring instincts Antonio has displayed since moving through the middle. West Ham travel to Brighton on Saturday and Antonio has been directly involved in 14 goals in his last 13 away Premier League starts with 11 goals and three assists. His underlying numbers are also very strong. When penalties are removed from the equation, Antonio has the highest expected goals per 90 average of any player in the league with more than 500 minutes on the clock this season. In this week's Football Nerd, I look at why Antonio has been so important to West Ham's European push.

fucking Citeh broke our all division English record for most consecutive away league wins in a season

insane game 3 4 Citeh so far Ferran Torres hat trick

2020-21 English Premier League Newcastle United Manchester City http://www.sportnews.to/mysports/2021/premier-league-newcastle-united-vs-manchester-city-s1/ https://www.totalsportek.com/page-3/

The FA Cup’s Greatest Ever Moments | Presented by Tifo

Kurt Zouma, not Jorginho, will pay the highest price for the calamity against Arsenal https://theathletic.com/2585414/2021/05/13/kurt-zouma-not-jorginho-will-pay-the-highest-price-for-the-calamity-against-arsenal/ The case seems cut and dry. If anyone is to be found guilty over Chelsea’s surprise loss to Arsenal, most people will point the finger in Jorginho’s direction. It was his strongly hit and poorly directed back-pass in the 16th minute which led to Arsenal’s only significant chance of the encounter and Emile Smith Rowe’s winning goal. However, while the midfielder was undoubtedly a culprit for what took place, Kurt Zouma should be accused of being an accessory. Significant post-match analysis of the incident for Australian broadcaster Optus Sport conducted by former Chelsea manager Glenn Hoddle and ex-Arsenal striker Ian Wright emerged online soon after the final whistle. It highlighted what a crucial role the France defender played in the goal. Zouma was picked to play on the left of a three-man central defence in the absence of the in-form Antonio Rudiger, who was rested because head coach Thomas Tuchel was concerned about the German being an injury risk having featured in a lot of matches recently. While the decision was understandable, it proved costly. Zouma is Chelsea’s best defender in the air but arguably their weakest when the ball is at his feet and it was this deficiency that came back to haunt them last night. As Zouma first received the ball, the 26-year-old had a simple task of either passing the ball to left-back Ben Chilwell or to goalkeeper Kepa Arrizabalaga. Instead, he switches it inside to Jorginho, who is quickly pressed, although there is still no danger at this stage because the midfielder plays it back to Zouma again. Zouma then has another opportunity to find Chilwell or midfielder Billy Gilmour but again opts for Jorginho. Smith Rowe is even closer to the Italy international this time and that leads Jorginho to knock it back towards his own goal in a hurry, with calamity ensuing. Both pundits in the studio were damning. Wright said: “He (Zouma) is actually saying, ‘I need options’, but he’s got options. He had a couple of opportunities in this move. I always thought it was a weakness — Kurt Zouma.” Hoddle added: “If that ball goes into Gilmour, like it should have done, we’d be saying, ‘Look how they played through the press’, and Chelsea would have been right at Arsenal. The difference is that poor decision from Zouma, to go back to Jorginho. Jorginho has panicked, and then all this happens.” Everyone makes mistakes, but the timing of Zouma’s awkward intervention is not the best for him. Tuchel will be figuring out who he can trust to play in defence for the FA Cup final on Saturday and Champions League final two weeks later, and this is likely to count against him. It doesn’t help his cause that Zouma also looked vulnerable in the 2-1 victory over Manchester City at the weekend after he came on as a substitute for the injured Andreas Christensen shortly after half-time. He let Raheem Sterling run in behind him on two occasions. On the first, it took a superb recovery tackle to deny the England international. But for the second he could have conceded a penalty after an awkward collision, although Sterling did seem to help engineer the contact. Since taking over in late January, Tuchel has made Cesar Azpilicueta, Thiago Silva, Rudiger and Christensen his preferred options to choose from in his back three. Christensen is a doubt due to the muscle injury sustained in Manchester, so one strongly suspects Tuchel will opt for the trio of Azpilicueta, Silva and Rudiger against Leicester at Wembley, with Reece James as the right wing-back. And given the flaws City exposed in that Premier League match last Saturday, it is doubtful Zouma will get a chance to face them from the start in the Champions League final in Porto on May 29. In contrast, Jorginho will still have a great chance of featuring in both finals. His error against Arsenal could be considered the worst of the two, but Zouma is set to pay a far heavier price for his.

Vlahovic, Isak, Malen… Bamford?! Who are the best Plan Bs to Erling Haaland? https://theathletic.com/2479067/2021/03/27/vlahovic-isak-malen-bamford-who-are-the-best-plan-bs-to-erling-haaland/ Everybody wants Erling Haaland. Whether every top club gazing hungrily in the Borussia Dortmund striker’s direction can actually afford to sign him this summer is another question. When transfer fee, wages and the cost of superagent Mino Raiola’s involvement are factored in, the total outlay could find its way north of £200 million. During a pandemic that has caused clubs huge financial damage. Manchester City, Manchester United and Chelsea are the English sides with the resources to do a hypothetical deal of that size, while Paris Saint-Germain, Real Madrid and Juventus also want to be in the conversation. Raiola has claimed, somewhat optimistically, that 10 clubs around Europe are in the running for the 20-year-old Norwegian. The list of serious suitors is likely to be a lot shorter, but it makes financial sense for Dortmund to encourage a bidding war at the end of this season rather than wait to sell in the summer of 2022, when Haaland’s value will be capped by the activation of a €75 million (£64.1 million) release clause in his contract. Whatever the eventual price, the club who succeed in convincing Haaland to continue his record-breaking career with them will consider the deal a more than worthy investment. But what about the suitors who fail? Only one can sign the striker who might end up dominating the next decade of European football, and the others will have to pivot to other plans. City, Chelsea and United all need another quality No 9 option regardless, so it would be wise for their wish-lists to be more than one name long. In consultation with our analytics team and Tifo Football, The Athletic has compiled a list of alternative strikers who fit a similar profile or could be ready to step up to a top club, and might reasonably be available this summer. But first, a disclaimer: no one is claiming any of the names below are or will be as good as Haaland, whose staggering body of work at 20 suggests he is a generational goalscoring talent, they are simply strikers who each possess qualities that might prove valuable to any top club that misses out on their top target this summer. With that in mind, let’s proceed… Haaland’s game is astonishingly minimalist. He is as pure a goalscorer as they come and while he links up well with Dortmund’s other attackers and midfielders, his energy on the pitch is almost entirely reserved for getting himself into scoring positions in the penalty area. Smarterscout is a tool that uses advanced metrics to give players a rating from zero to 99 based on either how often they perform a specific action compared to others playing their position, or how effective they are at it. Haaland’s statistical profile on smarterscout looks like late-career Cristiano Ronaldo has somehow been reincarnated as a hulking blond Norwegian nearly half his age, only with much less of an aerial threat than you might think given his size. It makes sense for clubs interested in Haaland to look first for other strikers with a similar statistical profile. How about Alexander Isak? A rare prospect who didn’t show his best qualities at Dortmund, where he started one Bundlesiga game in 18 months, the 21-year-old Swede is enjoying a breakthrough season in his second year at Real Sociedad. His tally of 12 goals in 24 La Liga appearances is good rather than spectacular, but none of them have come from the penalty spot. His non-penalty expected goals (npxG) per 90 minutes this season isn’t as far below the Norwegian as it might first appear; 0.63 to Haaland’s 0.76. Isak is just under 6ft 4in tall but relatively slight and therefore, like Haaland, is not a consistent aerial force despite his frame. His age means he has plenty of time to round out that aspect of his game, and there’s plenty else to recommend him right now. He offers a similar penalty box threat, links play well and is an unusually skilful ball carrier for his size, as well as being more impactful when his team doesn’t have the ball… The biggest issue with Isak is that any analysis of him as an elite striker in the making is based on a relatively small sample size. He scored 13 goals in 16 Eredivisie appearances on loan at Willem II from Dortmund for the second half of 2018-19, but he has less than a full season of shining in one of Europe’s top five leagues to his name. The €70 million (£59.8 million) buyout clause in his contract makes him cheaper than Haaland would be this summer, but still a significant gamble for a club seeking the finished article. A left-field name on this list happens to have one of the most similar statistical profiles to Haaland: Patrick Bamford, who is finally fulfilling the potential that convinced Chelsea to sign him nine years ago, when he was 18, in Marcelo Bielsa’s free-flowing Leeds United system. His 13 non-penalty goals in the Premier League this season have come from the highest npxG in the division (13.4), and the only regular starters who have averaged more shots per 90 minutes than his 3.3 are Harry Kane (3.8) and Kevin De Bruyne (3.7). He is also an asset to Leeds without the ball, leading the fierce Bielsa press from the front and creating opposition turnovers more frequently than Haaland or Isak do. In reality, it would be a huge surprise if any top club made a serious approach for Bamford this summer. Before this one, his best tally for goals in a single campaign was 17 with Middlesbrough in the 2014-15 Championship, and his reputation was as a good second-tier striker until Bielsa got hold of him three years ago. How do you separate his success from the system he plays in? And beyond the questions about whether he would be this good in another context, there is also the fact that, at 27 (turning 28 less than a month into next season), he is less likely to have significant room to grow his game. After what he has done this season, Leeds might well value him more highly than any club hoping to buy him. OK, so how about the striker who has scored as many Bundesliga goals this season as Haaland has? Andre Silva sits level with Haaland on 21 goals in 24 appearances for Eintracht Frankfurt; only Robert Lewandowski of Bayern Munich has scored more. Silva’s npxG per 90 minutes of 0.59 stands up well in comparison to other names in this list despite six of his goals coming from the penalty spot, and his overall contribution with and without the ball profiles well… Silva isn’t quite as relentless a penalty-box presence as Haaland but his smart, sharp runs get him into scoring positions frequently and once there, he is capable of converting clinically with either foot or his head. Like Haaland and Lewandowski, the Portugal international is outperforming his npxG of 13.4, which reflects well on his finishing (although few players outperform their xG for a whole career), and this is already his best scoring season as a professional. In fact, since the start of 2020, he has scored 36 goals in 52 appearances for club and country across all competitions. That is a big enough sample size, albeit disrupted by the pandemic shutdown, to suggest Silva is on more than a hot streak. It has taken him time to rebuild the momentum in his career following an ill-fated move from Porto to AC Milan in the summer of 2017 but, now 25, he appears fully formed and ready for a bigger stage. The only thing that might work against him is the recent example of Luka Jovic’s struggles at Real Madrid after enjoying a similarly prolific scoring run with Frankfurt (where he has now returned on loan from Madrid). Another 25-year-old striker building his reputation in Germany after a frustrating time in Serie A is Patrik Schick, the man in whom Bayer Leverkusen reinvested a significant chunk of the money Chelsea paid them for Kai Havertz last summer. Schick, an imposing figure in the air at almost 6ft 2in, offers more of a target-man presence up front – qualities that made him an effective foil for Timo Werner last season at RB Leipzig. His relatively modest return of eight goals (none of them penalties) becomes more impressive when you consider that only 15 of his 21 Bundesliga appearances for Leverkusen have been starts, giving him an npxG per 90 minutes of 0.60. Beyond his threat in the final third, Schick profiles as a well-rounded modern striker, capable of holding the ball up, bringing others into play and leading a team press. The problem is the 23-cap Czech Republic international simply doesn’t have the raw goal return that Europe’s elite clubs generally look for in their strikers; he is still trying to do better than the 11 goals he scored in his Serie A debut campaign with Sampdoria four years ago. Dusan Vlahovic has already surpassed that total with Fiorentina this season. The tall, bustling 21-year-old Serb turned heads around Europe a fortnight ago by capping a hat-trick against Benevento with a curling shot into the top corner from 25 yards but he generally does his damage in much closer proximity to the six-yard box. He is also, like Schick, a No 9 more in the target-man mould: Three of Vlahovic’s 12 league goals this season have come from the penalty spot and his npxG per 90 minutes of 0.46 is one of the less impressive in this list, but he is only just emerging as an elite prospect. His muscular, at times abrasive, style might one day fit particularly well at Chelsea, whose fans idolised Didier Drogba and Diego Costa, but it seems too soon to talk about him as a serious immediate target for any club with aspirations to challenge for the Premier League and Champions League. Rounding off the list are two exciting Dutch talents. Donyell Malen has established himself as one of the most dangerous forwards in the Eredivisie over the past two years, scoring 11 goals (two of them penalties) in 14 appearances before knee surgery ended his 2019-20 season in the December and 15 non-penalties in 26 so far in this one. He combines speed, sharp movement, skilled dribbling and poacher’s instincts, can score with either foot and only turned 22 in January. Then there is Myron Boadu, scorer of 12 non-penalty goals in 25 Eredivisie appearances for AZ Alkmaar this season. Just two months into his twenties, Boadu excels at dropping deep or drifting wide to contribute to his team’s build-up play, but also has the speed to play on the shoulder of the last defender and take up good positions in the penalty area. He is well on course to beat the 14 league goals he scored in 24 appearances in the pandemic-shortened 2019-20 season, and could already be good enough to shine on a bigger stage. No offence to the good people of Alkmaar. It’s impossible to ignore the fact that all of the names listed above are at least a level below Haaland in terms of the body of work he has already put together at RB Salzburg and now Dortmund. But, of course they are; he’s special, and that’s why the stakes are so high for all of the clubs trying to sign him this summer – he is the only sure thing in a transfer market riven with as much risk as promise. The other question the Manchester clubs and Chelsea need to ask themselves is whether any of the possible alternatives represent a meaningful improvement on what they already possess. None of them have a Haaland on their books, but all already have talented strikers who contribute different types of value to their teams, and finding an upgrade for a top-level team is rarely straightforward. City manager Pep Guardiola can already call on Gabriel Jesus and Sergio Aguero, who is currently set to be out of contract this summer and might actually make more sense as an alternative target for a club such as Chelsea if he is still physically capable of performing at near-prime level (he turns 33 in June). Jesus is an unusual striker whose goal return hasn’t justified the excitement that greeted his arrival from Brazilian club Palmeiras in January 2017, but his remarkable ability to press and defend from the front makes him uniquely suited to Guardiola’s style of play. Anthony Martial is a divisive figure among Manchester United fans and his tally of four goals in 22 Premier League appearances this season is seriously underwhelming, but his talent is not in question. His speed, skill level on the ball and intelligence in linking up with Marcus Rashford, Bruno Fernandes and Mason Greenwood is also a significant part of why Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’s team are so slick and dangerous in transition situations. Chelsea’s need for a truly elite goalscorer has been most glaring this season, in large part because of the struggles of Werner and Tammy Abraham. Olivier Giroud is a) out of contract this summer and b) 35 in September but in Abraham, they have a young No 9 who, last season, was scoring from open play at a comparable rate to Kane when he was the same age. The 23-year-old’s goal threat may have been far less consistent this season… …but his profile last season indicated a talented, improving goalscorer who provided a significant asset to his team when they were out of possession. The club who successfully persuade Haaland to join them can probably consider their No 9 spot sorted until the day he leaves them. For those who lose in one of the most hotly-anticipated transfer battles of recent years, there will be no simple Plan B.

did anyone see this? Benjamin Mendy (the Citeh LB)

I would for fashion, but not for football, lol. I love white with bold prints, they usually look great on me. You can see my tastes in fashion (for both mean and women) in the Fashion, Art, and Design thread.

wtf Chelsea appear to list two new squad additions before quickly deleting from website The Blues have put their new shirt for next season on sale, though may have accidentally given fans an insight into who they will be targeting when the summer transfer window opens https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/Chelsea-benjamin-mendy-transfer-news-24101417 Chelsea appear to have accidentally announced the signing of Benjamin Mendy and Lauren James after putting their shirts for next season on sale. Mendy has been hit by a succession of significant injuries in recent seasons and has fallen down the pecking order at Manchester City. He has made only 12 appearances in the Premier League this season as Pep Guardiola’s side have marched to their third title in four years, with the Frenchman mainly left on the bench. With Mendy out of contract in two years’ time, the defender would appear likely to be a casualty of Guardiola’s expected squad rebuild in the upcoming transfer window.

because its a different schedule and pool have insanely easy run it, plus we are missing key players it doesn't take a lot of maths to look at 2 games, especially as one of them is against a main rival

it would be the biggest collapse in Chels history if we blow 2 massive cup finals and miss CL worse than 2008, as even if we had won the last day Manure would have beaten us for the EPL title on GD, and we lost the league cup final, we crashed out of FA cup earlier and we DID get CL for 2008/09

they WERE out of it dead in the water we let them in

we are fucked unless we win both EPL games I fear and it really is shit as if we had just done the business versus West Brom, BHA and arse, we could have fielded shit versus Leicester in the EPl game and let them basically eliminate Pool from the CL (more or less)

I said that the minute is was called off I knew they would ram it in the middle of a week

2 4 Salah game over 🤬

Matic on McTominay at CB now