Spike

I really admire Southampton. They conduct business so professionally and astutely. When they sell players to clubs, they seem to know exactly who to replace them with.

Nobody could have predicted that the core of Chelsea would under perform. The signings made were perfect at the time, a striker, winger and fullback. They were areas that needed strengthening in depth and they were. Diego Costa, Hazard, Ivanovic, Terry, Matic, Courtois and Fabregas are underperforming. They are all starters from last season, no manager in the world could handle 7/11 of their team falling apart in the blink of an eye. This is a freak occurrence. Everything will be fine. Thanks to a certain member for bringing this up and making it clear to me.

I'm going to cook vaca frita for the first time tomorrow.

I always thought he was a shitty, selfish forward but damn was I wrong. One of the best forwards in England and if he were healthy, he'd be dragging Liverpool's arse to a better position.

It is amazing how he has changed his style so much from around 2007. Now he is essentially a big ol' target man that can smash in headers and put away tap ins. Just a fancy Ruud van Nistelrooy. He 'plays wide' of course, despite spending not much of his time there. Easily the best aerial forward in the world. No one can head a ball like Cristiano.

'Link up play' is another buzzword that I hate. I should keep a list of things I hate.

Harry Kane will never be a Chelsea player.

A football manager is a lot like a film director. When a film is rubbish the director takes the blame.

Oh fuck no. Juve over performed last season and their CL final berth was an anomaly much like Chelsea's was in 2012. They have a good team but nothing near world class.

Gotze is the literal definition of a wigger. His dress sense is straight outta the Slim Shady LP.

The team makes Cesc look bad because they don't know what to do with his passes. The guy [Cesc] is a liability in defence and possession, anybody who has watched Barcelona and Arsenal know that. Fabregas's defensive positioning has and always will be horrible. That is why he didn't work in Barcelona's midfield. Mourinho likes structure, I get the feeling players like Hazard and Fabregas are the opposite.

Driving is alright. You don't know bad traffic. When you spend time in a city that isn't sectioned into a grid, you'll know bad traffic. Chicago is alright, aside from the disgusting industrial architecture and stink some streets have.

Hilarious match.

He does look like he has foetal alcohol syndrome.

He wasn't that bad. He tried to make stuff happen but it is hard when players around don't know what to do. He has never been a defensive or a ball retaining stalwart, so I never expect that from him.

Easily the third best player in the world. Behind Robbie Keane and Dimitar Berbatov.

Pretty good result considering. I'll take it.

You'll be fine as long as you don't go to the southside.

He should have been given a rotational role after his Watford loan. Dropped the ball here.

Wasn't Henry the second most expensive English signing at the time? It is all about context.

Age is something that is overplayed and ultimately pointless as is 'potential'. Who cares? Lampard did fuck all in his career till he was 25. On the contrary Ronaldinho was burnt out by the time he was 26.

That isn't bias. That is being shocked by an unexpected goal. Everyone knows what Crespo is capable of and for him to score against Wigan in such a fashion isn't shocking. Martial, a relative unknown scoring an amazing goal on his debut is far more surprising than a world class striker scoring a world class goal. The anti-Chelsea bias in the media is overplayed. Everyone drooled over Mata when he was a Chelsea player. During the 11/12 and 12/13 seasons he was probably the most adored player in the league. When Hazard is one form, he is almost worshipped by pundits. As for the Thierry Henry comparisons. It isn't surprising. He is black, French, played for Monaco and plays as a striker/winger. Not only that but his first goal is a mirror image of one Henry has scored before. Will he be as talented? I don't know. Even people were comparing Lukaku to Drogba despite being completely different players. Big and black is their only similarities.

Son, the WWF hasn't existed for nearly 15 years. Are you under a rock?

KING OF THE DELECTED GOALS DEFLECTED GOALS BROOOOOOO

Now if he can do that more often, we are easy. Shame that he has moments of forgetting how to pass.