Ferdinand to Miss Rest of Season

[Fulham Broadway 16,846]

Drugs test avoider Ferdinand was at risk from missing Manchester Uniteds crucial end of season run in it was announced yesterday.

The slightly bonkers hairlipped referee harasser, slipped whilst trying to avoid a drugs test it was confirmed from Old Trafford sources.

An Old Trafford insider said ‘’the lad was roasting a granny with Rooney , when Chiquitito said ‘’Hey gringos, you wanna get high on my Mexican talcum powder ?’’ At which point he produced the biggest line of narcotics ever seen. At the same time the wild eyed shot stoppers phone signalled he was due a random substance abuse test. The resulting trip and skid on Hernandez ‘ coke led to an anterior cruciate ligament rupture. Or something.

Alex Ferguson –speaking from his cage, said on a videolink to MUTV ‘’The big coloured lads done his knee in’’ before burning an effigy of a referee.

This is a triple blow for The Glazers Investment Debt Fund, as the Rafael twins went missing after mumbling something about ‘’the new Jedward’’, and Nemanja Vidic was due to appear in The Hague before the United Nations on War crimes charges.

[eldo 868]

Thats funny.

Man utd have an injury crisis, apparently O'Shea will be sidelined for 5 weeks and Rafael for 3, while Vidic and Evans are not fit jet.

[Term-X 7,891]

'the new Jedward' Lmao.

[BLionheart 516]

Sturridge has a great chance to win all the chelsea fans this weekend .

[termninja 5,290]

Nemanja Vidic was due to appear in The Hague before the United Nations on War crimes charges.

LMFAO

[HRiver 1,512]

Is he really injured?

[diskoviolente 425]

Yes.