OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Fuck yeah. At least it somewhat resembles a beard.I think I'm gonna attempt to grow a Juan Mata-esque beard.. well when I say attempt I mean not shave for ages until I have a beard... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I think I'm gonna attempt to grow a Juan Mata-esque beard..What I want my beard to look like:What it actually looks like (actually it's a bit thicker): Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leif 6,006 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Once, in Primary School, I had a very scary teacher who was doing art with us. She gave me her special brown pen so I could colour something in as all the other brown pens were being used.I broke the pen, and was too scared to say anything.So I went to the toilet with the drawing I wanted to colour in brown and took a big shit on the floor. I then got a paper towel and picked some of the poo up, took it over to a sink and tried to make it into a paste by adding a little water.I then dabbed my index finger into the poo mixture and simply stroked the areas of my drawing I wanted brown.I just wanted to share that with you all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Once, in Primary School, I had a very scary teacher who was doing art with us. She gave me her special brown pen so I could colour something in as all the other brown pens were being used.I broke the pen, and was too scared to say anything.So I went to the toilet with the drawing I wanted to colour in brown and took a big shit on the floor. I then got a paper towel and picked some of the poo up, took it over to a sink and tried to make it into a paste by adding a little water.I then dabbed my index finger into the poo mixture and simply stroked the areas of my drawing I wanted brown.I just wanted to share that with you all.No. You did not do that.Sick fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 What I want my beard to look like:What it actually looks like (actually it's a bit thicker):Mines isn't completely noticeable but I'm going to keep growing it and look like a homeless with my bottle of scotch next to me. Amblève. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Mines isn't completely noticeable but I'm going to keep growing it and look like a homeless with my bottle of scotch next to me.I have two years on you, boy. You'll be as handsome as me one day. OneMoSalah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I have two years on you, boy. You'll be as handsome as me one day.I know, I know... I might be more handsome tbh mate, lets be honest here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leif 6,006 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 @, I did indeed do that. You're just jealous that you couldn't mastermind such an ingenious plot when facing dire circumstantial like I was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I know, I know... I might be more handsome tbh mate, lets be honest here. I bet you're riddle with acne. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hutcho 8,443 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Once, in Primary School, I had a very scary teacher who was doing art with us. She gave me her special brown pen so I could colour something in as all the other brown pens were being used.I broke the pen, and was too scared to say anything.So I went to the toilet with the drawing I wanted to colour in brown and took a big shit on the floor. I then got a paper towel and picked some of the poo up, took it over to a sink and tried to make it into a paste by adding a little water.I then dabbed my index finger into the poo mixture and simply stroked the areas of my drawing I wanted brown.I just wanted to share that with you all.you share the most amazing things... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I bet you're riddle with acne.I am riddled with genital warts if that is any better..NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 @, I did indeed do that. You're just jealous that you couldn't mastermind such an ingenious plot when facing dire circumstantial like I was.I would not have landed in such a idiotic sitiation. I've always had my wits about me.Sick fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I am riddled with genital warts if that is any better..NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTWho'd you get those off? Some dirty street walking skank that you go to school with I bet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Once, in Primary School, I had a very scary teacher who was doing art with us. She gave me her special brown pen so I could colour something in as all the other brown pens were being used.I broke the pen, and was too scared to say anything.So I went to the toilet with the drawing I wanted to colour in brown and took a big shit on the floor. I then got a paper towel and picked some of the poo up, took it over to a sink and tried to make it into a paste by adding a little water.I then dabbed my index finger into the poo mixture and simply stroked the areas of my drawing I wanted brown.I just wanted to share that with you all.Basically you shat yourself because the teacher would have ripped you a new one for breaking a "wee brown pencil", fuck me you share the best stories ever, that happened to me too.... did it fuck hahahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Who'd you get those off? Some dirty street walking skank that you go to school with I bet.Bought them from amazontalking about school I really should be in the now but I cba moving. Does that make me a bad person? No it makes me Scottish. Lazy and prefers to be out of education... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I have a good school story too. Once when I was a wee lad of 13 we were playing football for PE. The teacher was female and she was an idiot. She didn't quite understand the rules and eventually after being called offside one too many times she said "How about you stay onside for once?", I replied "How about you suck my dick?". Suspened for three days. Hutcho and Amblève. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hutcho 8,443 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 I have a good school story too. Once when I was a wee lad of 13 we were playing football for PE. The teacher was female and she was an idiot. She didn't quite understand the rules and eventually after being called offside one too many times she said "How about you stay onside for once?", I replied "How about you suck my dick?". Suspened for three days.Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Bought them from amazontalking about school I really should be in the now but I cba moving. Does that make me a bad person? No it makes me Scottish. Lazy and prefers to be out of education... When Iwas in High School all the girls fit into one of three categories. Mean, ugly and fat. I'm not joking all the girls fit into one of those categories, none of them were good looking. None. There was one I fancied and should have got with, but I got way too drunk one New Years and you know how it is with the scotch. OneMoSalah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoSalah 8,886 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 When Iwas in High School all the girls fit into one of three categories. Mean, ugly and fat. I'm not joking all the girls fit into one of those categories, none of them were good looking. None. There was one I fancied and should have got with, but I got way too drunk one New Years and you know how it is with the scotch.All the girls in Scotland fit into this category. Sluts. Hhahahaha true fact. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spike 12,049 Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 All the girls in Scotland fit into this category. Sluts. Hhahahaha true fact.Is there such a thing as an attractive Scottish bird? I've never met one. Well that's not necessarily true...there was this one...Fucking hell there is this Canadian girl around town. I must become charming in the next few days. Or failing that become handsome. OneMoSalah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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