Vesper

IF Morata fucks up the ONLY strikers at present I will fucking accept are these (I am DEAD serious) Mbappe (will never happen BUT he is my number one player on planet (or SOON will be), and billionaires like Roman COULD buy him Icardi Dybala Griezmann Martial Maybe Andrea Belotti IF he rebounds for Torino in a huge way or Timo Werner IF he finally takes it to next level. Lastly, new name, very intriguing : Giovanni Simeone IF he takes it to 25, 30 goal level this year for Fiorentina. He just turned 23, scored 14 league goals with 9 assists and is the one in Italy I would watch Yes, his daddy is Diego, lol, so he may end up at Atleti THAT IS IT! Nothing less is acceptably close IF Morata fucks up.All the other under 30yo top strikers (Kane, Lukaku, Gabriel Jesus, Rashford) will never be sold to us in their prime by their current teams. Ciro Immobile would be 30 in mid season of 2019-20 so we will not sign him to a multi-year contract Maybe a 30 plus year old on a one year stop-gap contract (Lewandowski, Edinson Cavani, Sergio Agüero (GAG, I hate that cunty fuck) Luis Suárez (another gag) lets hope Lautaro Martínez goes supernova for Inter, so they would more easily part with Icardi!! Italian-wise 20yo Patrick Cutrone too with Milan,and his 22yo teammate, who looks like he just may come good finally, (Andre Silva) too, but they are not remotely there atm.. WE STILL could sign Mario Balotelli on a free, even with shut window. He will get snapped up by some club, as he is much more mature and played great for Nice last season. Side note Valencia now has FOUR strikers worth over £30m or so Rodrigo Michy Batshuayi Simone Zaza Santi Mina (watch him, only 22 and had 18 goals in all comps last year) They must be selling one, as 4 will never get enough total playing time

I LOVE the MF love the GK, (backup is shit, wished we had sold Caballero and bought Reina but oh well) Kepa is a DREAM signing, I rate him over all but Oblak, De Gea (not in 2,3 years) CUNT Courtois (and Kepa is potentially better than all 3 of those) and maybe maybe Alisson and Ederson (but not sure, I think I would still take him, as he is also only 23) Love the RB mostly (I think Azpi will be able to learn to integrate more effectively on offensive end) and Zappacosta is far from a dog for a backup Love 3 of the CB's (AC, Rudiger, Ampadu, but sooo wish (I am his only fan here!) we had gotten Rugani (not Caldara, but Rugani) as Luiz and Cahill are shit and LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE LW (obviously) BUT and this is my honest gut feel, I may be shown to be wrong I think we are fucked at LB Alonso is going to be a nightmare I fear,as he is sooo slow LB can be a strength, NOT a weakness IF Emerson is finally fit and plays up to his potential, which is MASSIVE. I only rate (in order) these 7 above him IF Emerson plays to level David Alaba (best LB and best fullback by miles on the planet) Alex Sandro Marcelo Benjamin Mendy (will soon pass all but Alaba in 2 or 3 years ) Jordi Alba Lucas Hernández (soon just under Mendy for third best as Marcelo and alba slow down) Alex Telles (Insane he is still at Porto, I think he moves for sure in next 3 weeks) RW is a hugely problematic area, I am NOT at all sold on William, and Pedro looks old the last couple of games, we are idiots for not doing whatever it took to sell him and buy Bailey or Malcom (38m Barca paid for him!!) or Ousmane Dembélé (probably too much money so never really pushed him, BUT he is by far top upside) or Zaha or Suso (who some some here wrongly slate, IMHO) I SOOOOOOOO wish swap for Martial for Willian had gone down which leads me to the TRUE nightmare STRIKER Morata Giroud Abraham (is NOT a Cheslea quality player at this point) is doom ahead level potentially bad still waiting to hear any legit reason why we didn't fix this, other than fantasy land hope that Morata finally comes good hopefully next year we come to sense and grab Icardi or Martial (if he isnt sold this summer to a non EPL team) or Dybala (who I think can move from 2nd striker to main man and is only one who I MIGHT rate besides Kane/Griezmann (maybe Griezmann, I think icardi is better, many do not) over Icardi holy shit, Dybala would go for 30 league goals alone in Sarriball with Bailey as RW and our new MF, plus Hazard looking ahead if Morata implodes and LB doesnt come good and RW is fucked we so so need to Buy LB Alex Sandro (next year is last year I push him,as he will turn 29 in middle of 2019-20 season) or Alex Telles for LB, Faouzi Ghoulam is same almost exact age as Alex Sandro, so next summer is his last go round for me with him as well. José Gayà and Alejandro Grimaldo are the last good options. Alaba is too expensive and Bayern wouldn't sell him for less than £100m (he is worth £80m IMHO) RB (if Azpi goes or struggles in a back 4 Sarriball, then we scramble, there is slim pickings, In order Nélson Semedo (If Sergi Roberto is not moved to MF and retains RB for Barca, it KILLED me when we didnt get him (Sergi) last year) Djibril Sidibé <<< cannot believ a club has not grabbed him, he is the2nd best on this list (maybe best) Benjamin Henrichs (if he rebounds weshould grab him, but he has big competiton now as Bayer leverkusen brought in Mitchell Weiser from Hertha Berlin (heinrichsis NOT a happy camper atm) Nordi Mukiele (who RB Leipzig just bought, so probably a no go) Joe Gomez (LPool will never sell him to us and I really think (as he is a natural CB) that they pair him with Van Dijk soon) Thomas Meunier (a good steady player, nothing spectacular, but he would do if we have to replace Azpi. His yellow card suspension fucked up Belgium v France in WC) Thats it out there in terms of quality RB's who will be remotely available (and some probable not) Striker Icardi, Martial or Dybala for Striker (Belotti if he rebounds in a huge way is an option too) NOTHING ELSE IS FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME GODDAMNIT If we bought Ciro Immobile next summer, he turns 30 within months. MAYBE Timo Werner, if he explodes this year RW and Bailey or Demebele or Zaha or Christian Pulisic (if he progresses) or Federico Bernardeschi or Federico Chiesa for RW MF hold onto Kovacic (if he comes good) or if Real will not sell him to us then go after SMS (if he isnt sold this window or January and yes, this is a pipe dream) or Isco or Talisca (huge drop down from Isco, but still super good) or Saúl Ñíguez (pipe dream) Other options are Amadou Haidara (I am a HUGE fan of this 20yo, he has insane upside) Julian Draxler, Nabil Fekir, Carlos Soler, Ryan Sessegnon (first time I bring him up) Kai Havertz, Pablo Fornals, Miralem Pjanic (last year for him as well, as he turns 29 in April) Thiago, Corentin Tolisso, Piotr Zielinski (I rate Kovacic over him) Bruno Fernandes CB (Rugani will not be available, I think he comes huge with Juve this year) One of the following Kalidou Koulibaly (next summer is the LAST year you hear me push him, as the year after that he is 29) Marquinhos (if still at PSG, and he will be a shit tonne of money), José Giménez (TOUGH pull) Benjamin Pavard (if available, and he can spell Azpi at RB) Matthijs de Ligt (if available, and he will be so expensive too, even though only 19 next year) then if none of them,drop down to young young Thilo Kehrer (I REALLY rate him) Malang Sarr Dayot Upamecano Issa Diop (if he is great at West Sham) Panagiotis Retsos

Oh, I give you the point that a 25 year old bats is more athletic overall than a 25 year old Higuain, but Higs is MILES more football intelligent and effective. Bats is very one dimensional and terrible at build up play.It is like playing with 10 men at times.

Bats is NOT even remotely close to Higuain (who I didn't want to sign anyway as he is too old soon). Higuain is also massively fit after a big summer fitness routine. Have you seen the new videos and pics of him?

Or Monkey Dust http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6047137/Drug-Monkey-Dust-said-turn-users-Hulk-costs-little-2.html

Icardi slow and not dynamic???????? What games have you been watching? He is a machine and deadly efficient. He has super pace too. Far beyond anything we have at atm. Only one I tare higher would be Kane (as Ronaldo is going to be 34 in 5 and half months and I NEVER play CR7 and/or Messi-on-a-team games). Maybe Antoine Griezmann. Those 3 (Kane, Icardi, Griezmann) are now (or soon will be as Lewandowski hits 30 in 11 days and has but 2 or 3 tops years left max, a 33 year old Lewa is so NOT a 33 yo CR7) miles beyond all other pure strikers. I dont count Mbappe (who will be best player on planet this year or next 1, 2 max) as a pure striker, although put HIM in that role on our team, puts Alex Sandro at LB, and add Bailey at RW and we would have great shot at winning not just EPL but CL as well. Those 3 adds would make THAT much of a difference. Lukaku, Robert Lewandowski (30yo), Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang (30 in 10 months) , Aguero (30 next entire 2019-20 season), Gabriel Jesus, Edinson Cavani (32 in February), Dries Mertens (32 this season) Suarez (32 in January) Ciro Immobile (29 in a few months) Diego Costa (no comment, lol, other than he will 30 in 6 weeks) are next tier down. That leaves only remotely good ones left as Martial (who was THE answer if not Icardi and we FUCKED up the swap for Willan), Rashford, Higuain (31 in exactly 4 months) , and maybe maybe Timo Werner (I have not seen him deliver the goods v good competition usually). Andrea Belotti (had a really bad year, IF he rebounds would be a good option) As you can see, the only ones who are not wrong side of 30 (or soon will be and thus no multi-year contracts from us) are Kane (will never happen) Icardi (biggest fuckup of any team in world this window was us not signing him for £98m between July 1and July 15, when he had 2 weeks release clause at that level) Griezmann (who turns 30 in the season after next) will never come her unless its as a 30 plus something one year at end of top level career Lukaku LOLOL, thanks board!! Gabriel Jesus cannot see this happening ever whilst he is under 30 Ciro Immobile (turns 30 in middle of next season) after Icardi and Martial, this was 3rd best option, but time is running out due to his age Martial HUGE COCK UP, GRRRR Rashford If we cannot get Martial, we surely wont get him, lol Timo Werner (maybe) IF he has a great year,this is a legit option for next year Andrea Belotti (IF he rebounds would be a good option, we simply could not take the chance this window on him being another Morata flop) that's it atm, literally That's not a lot to choose from (Mbappe is not an option, curse the gods)

I know I am a nutter for holding out hope, but dammit I want Morata to come good in a huge way. He needs to have aggression-implanting hypnotherapy.

Unless they are truly young stars (think CHO/Ampadu level) I doubt we would NOT sell to a team if they met our price. Until he he ripped up his knee, van Ginkel was on the verge of having PSV ( a really great mid-size club all round) scrape up the quid to buy him outright. He was a holy terror in the Eredivisie the last 2 and a half years (29 goals, 17 assists, in 56 league games). He even replaced Luuk de Jong as captain of PSV as a loanee, That's how much they thought of him

Jonathan Pie Boris and The Burka

Sell them both (if Baka isn't moved to a La Liga or Serie A or Bundesliga or Ligue 1 club) to China, surely the richer clubs there will at least give decent money for them and pay their wages. Drinkwater would be a big draw, as it is rare for a Brit player in his prime (cough, cough) to travel that far abroad.

It would not be a buy back, it would be an option to buy. I so hope it is in there. I feel we are simply training Modric's replacement otherwise.

Thibaut Courtois: It would be 'fantastic' if Eden Hazard also joined Real Madrid https://www.givemesport.com/1369676-thibaut-courtois-infuriates-chelsea-fans-with-disrespectful-eden-hazard-comment

Major M&A deal at my hedge fund, been knee deep in a 45,000 page contract

Courtois!!!

https://www.totalsportek.com/chelsea-live-stream/

https://www.totalsportek.com/chelsea-live-stream/

Butland is not good with ball at feet and is bad at distribution, go watch Stoke replays

Tosh. I cannot believe you even said that. Lol

Because that is directly where the board and Roman are taking us. I mean ffs, GK Caballero SHOOT ME NOW! CB Rudiger or god help us Cahill CB AC or god help us Luiz Ampadu needs to come good at 17 LB Alonso (help!) or unproven Emerson RB Azpi (has been horrid offensively in back 4 so far) or a mediocre Zappacosta DMF Kante (insane reliance we have on him now) DHMF Jorginho (hopefully Kante relieves pressure on him) AMF Barkley or RLC both have been shit so far in that role Backup MF are SHIT Baka, Drinkwater, worn down Fabregas LW Hazard (Along with Kante, insane pressure on him and he might be gone next year on the cheap) CHO (bright point) RW Willian (crazy we didnt sell or swap him) or Pedro (has looked for shit last several games) Striker Morata (doom) Giroud (oki as backup) Bats...wildcard in every way Not looking good at all

I saw a week ago Stoke said £30m and he is whoever pays that's new keeper. He is SHIT at ball distribution. FFS I dont see why the board doesn't just pay that £30m or so to PSG and grab Alphonse Areola. Hell, more if we have to. Better a French nipple than a British butt. That motto has served me well on some dates back in the day before I married my wife.

So Caballero is going to be our number one GK?????

Snodgrass for the sleeper panic buy. I will jump, I swear.

We are so fucked without Hazard and Kante and Courtois. That's my number one takeaway. Going to try and not read too much into this game. City are also a top 5 in world side, so it's safe to say we were outclassed even if they didn't have all their players.