Vesper

according to shit Mundo Deportivo, the Saul deal has collapsed https://www.mundodeportivo.com/futbol/atletico-madrid/20210827/1001682154/saul-queda.html Saul stays! ATLÉTICO DE MADRID The player's environment closes the exit door to Chelsea and they do not expect a last minute offer From Atlético de Madrid they saw the exit of him in this end of the market very complicated, and they counted on him There are practically hours until the end of the summer market and Saúl will play this season for Atlético de Madrid. MD has confirmed that the last option he had on the table to go to Chelsea has been vanished. In this way, his departure is practically ruled out except for a last minute offer that is not expected either in the club or in the player's environment.

An ageing egomaniac in need of an audience to fawn at his feet Guess who’s back, back again. Photograph: Reuters File Photo/Action Images/Reuters Barry Glendenning @bglendenning RED RONNIE, YELLOW (AND GREEN) RONNIE Although Cristiano Ronaldo rocked up at the Juventus training ground this morning, he didn’t hang around for too long. After barely 40 minutes – hardly enough time for a long lingering look in the dressing-room mirror and a quick “arrivederci” to his mates – he was gone again for the last time. With Juve eager to get him off their payroll, their manager Max Allegri eventually confirmed their ageing Portuguese show-pony had trotted away for good. “Yesterday, Cristiano told me that he no longer has any intention to play for Juventus,” said Count Max. “Cristiano is to be thanked for what he has done, also as an example amongst the youngsters. But as I said, we must go on. Things change, it’s a law of life. Juventus remains, which is the most important thing. Cristiano gave his contribution, he made himself available, now he leaves and life goes on.” Missing out on Kane and Ronaldo leaves Manchester City short up front Read more In very public need of a striker after Harry Kane failed to force a move away from Tottenham, Manchester City had been in negotiations with Ronaldo. But following reports they were in talks with his Mr 15% Jorge Mendes – who unlike Kane’s brother, Charlie, will almost definitely have turned up wearing his Super Agent Big Boy pants – they were unable to strike a deal.. Had City secured the signature of the five-time Ballon D’Or winner, their owners would no doubt have considered it a serious statement signing, even if what it is exactly they were trying to say remains a little unclear. Aged 36, prone to diva strops and unlikely to buy into the high-intensity team ethos so beloved of Pep Guardiola, it has not gone unnoticed that for all his obvious talents, Ronaldo’s arrival in Turin actually made Juventus worse. What next, then, for Cristiano, an ageing egomaniac in need of an audience to fawn at his feet as he enters the last knockings of his career? Well, it turns out City aren’t the only club in Manchester with owners prepared to sanction lavish spending on players they don’t necessarily need in the interests of fan appeasement and promotion of the global brand. Having spent six years making his name at Manchester United, the player was let known in no uncertain terms on Friday that he would be welcomed back to the club with open arms. “We’ve always had good communication,” Ole Gunnar Solskjær told the ladies and gentlemen of the press. “Bruno [Fernandes has] been talking to him as well and he knows what we feel about him. And if he was ever gonna move away from Juventus he knows we’re here.” With this story developing faster than your hapless Fiver can keep up, United dramatically announced a deal was in place at 4.51pm [thanks guys – Fiver Ed]. With CR7 seemingly on his way back to Old Trafford, United might think they’ve won this particular Manchester derby, but time will tell. QUOTE OF THE DAY “We tried to open the door to negotiate but the big master of the negotiation, Daniel Levy, knows everything and he would not do it. Maybe I would do the same if I had Harry Kane in my team” – Pep Guardiola aims a dig at the Tottenham chairman, who presumably will not respond. Pep: salty. Photograph: Phil Oldham/Shutterstock FIVER LETTERS “About 100 years ago in these very pages, I suggested that Harry Winks be given the number 40 shirt at Spurs. Now I’m thinking Burnley’s new signing Maxwell Cornet should wear shirt number 99 – or am I just, in my dotage, getting a little Flake-y?” – Tony Crawford. “Ronaldo back to Manchester United? Despite his protestations to the contrary that he’s his own man, I’m expecting Ole Gunnar Solskjær to soon develop a deep Govan accent, get involved in a petty squabble with the BBC and insists that all journalists are effing idiots” – Darren Leathley. “Was sad to see $exually Repressed Morris Dancing Fiver was not named in the England squad. Is this because of undisclosed bell shin knack? [Inevitably, yes – Fiver Ed]. Best wishes for his speedy recovery” – Paul Arnold (and 1,056 others). Send your letters to [email protected], or tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport, to win a copy of Underground, Overground: The Fault Lines of Football Clubs by Andi Thomas. You can read an extract from the book here. Today’s winner of a copy is … Tony Crawford. NEWS, BITS AND BOBS Manchester City’s Benjamin Mendy has been remanded in custody after appearing in court charged with four counts of rape and a sexual assault. Real Madrid still want Kylian Mbappé and have offered €180m (£154m) to PSG. It may take a world record fee to land the French flier, it says here. Over at Anfield, Big Jürg has suggested United’s move for 36-year-old Cristiano Ronaldo might be a short-term fix. “It’s for now and immediately. That’s how some clubs are obviously working and that’s absolutely fine,” Jürg gurgled. Klopp: chippy. Photograph: Andrew Powell/Liverpool FC/Getty Images Pep Guardiola has swiftly backtracked after suggesting in a Zoom call that he plans to leave Manchester City in 2023. “I am not thinking to leave after two years,” he trilled. “After my period at Manchester City I will take a break. That’s for sure. It can be in one month, in two years, three years, five years.” Big Vase draw news: David Moyes’ Taxpayers FC jolly will take in trips to Dinamo Zagreb, Genk and Rapid Vienna while Brendan’s Leicester don’t have it easy when facing Napoli, Legia Warsaw and Spartak Moscow. The Queen’s Celtic have Bayer Leverkusen, Real Betis and Ferencvaros, while the Pope’s O’Rangers pulled Lyon, Sparta Prague and Brondby. Big GM Vauxhall Conference draw news: Harry Kane will be touring French side Rennes, Vitesse from the Netherlands and Slovenian outfit Mura with his Tottenham troupe. Nasty Leeds have signed teenage Norwegian defender Leo Hjelde from Celtic for an undisclosed fee while Chelsea’s Kurt Zouma is having a medical before a move to West Ham. In other transfer news, Will Hughes is taking his blonde ambition from Watford to Crystal Palace, with the Hornets keen on Moussa Sissoko. Meanwhile Alen Halilovic, once of Barcelona, has signed for Reading. STILL WANT MORE? No Sergio Agüero. No Harry Kane. And no Ronnie. Here’s Will Unwin on what it all means for Pep Guardiola and City. Happy times at Arsenal, remember them? Freddie Ljungberg looks back on the golden days under Arsène Wenger. Fred: quality. Composite: Action Images; Arsenal FC via Getty Images Big Cup group stage analysis? Jonathan Wilson picks his winner from the Salzburg, Sevilla, Wolfsburg, Lille Group of Big Vase Escapees. Can Pep Guardiola capture the Champions League in the time he said he had left to those Brazilian suits, wonders Will Unwin. Kane, Lukaku, Aubameyang, Mateta. Strikers seize the agenda in this weekend’s Premier League things to look out for. Liverpool and Matt Beard target a return to the Women’s Super League but it won’t be easy, reports Louise Taylor. Match previews! Get yer Premier League match previews! Catch up with the latest moves in our women’s and men’s transfer interactives. And sign up for a daily Big Sports Day email here. It’s not particularly funny but, hey, glass houses and all that. Oh, and if it’s your thing … you can follow Big Website on Big Social FaceSpace. And INSTACHAT, TOO! ANNOUNCE JAUNTY

wow

he is having a good season ambipedal too they have a classy young big CB too

I would wager some from this group (no true order) of 15 Håland (if they are insane) Harry Kane (if they are insane) Dusan Vlahovic Chiesa (grrr) Theo Hernandez (grrrrr) Nicolò Barella (grrrrrrr) Camavinga (grrrr) Aurélien Tchouaméni (grrrrrrr) Jude Bellingham (grrrrr) Kingsley Coman Paul Pogba (maybe try to get him on a free in 2022) Nuno Mendes (LB teen from Sporting Lisbon) Jonathan David Raheem Sterling Complete wild card, Robert Lewandowski

not saying the deal will NOT happen, i think it will but that tweet is dross, they are going off a notorious rumour monger (Felix Diaz of Marca) there is ZERO official confirmation that PSG have accepted the €180m

2021-22 UEFA Europa Conference League Qualifying, Playoff Round Tottenham Hotspur Paços de Ferreira http://www.sportnews.to/sports/2021/europa-conference-league-tottenham-hotspur-vs-pacos-de-ferreira-s1/ https://www.totalsportek.com/football/tottenham-hotspur-vs-pacos-de-ferreira-live-stream/ Tottenham Formation 3-4-2-1 Paços de Ferreira Formation 4-3-3

this season is the bomb so far weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee but it makes me nervous as well

UEFA Men's Player of the Year - Jorginho UEFA men's coach of the year - Thomas Tuchel UEFA men's midfielder of the year - N'Golo Kante UEFA Men's goalkeeper of the season - Edouard Mendy BOOM

pussyklaat groups (meaning only one or zero (in bold) really class teams) GROUP C : Sporting CP (Portugal), Borussia Dortmund (Germany), Ajax (Netherlands), Besiktas (Turkey) and Dortmund, even with Håland, are hardly a great side GROUP F: Villarreal (Spain), Manchester United (England), Atalanta (Italy), Young Boys (Switzerland). << Mnaure are, as is almost always the case lucky fuckers GROUP G: Lille (France), Sevilla (Spain), FC Salzburg (Austria), Wolfsburg (Germany). <<< probably the weakest CL group I have ever seen, or damn close maybe Juve will have no CR7 when they face us at least GROUP H: Chelsea (England), Juventus (Italy), Zenit St. Petersburg (Russia), Malmö (Sweden). lol, back again to Sweden, whish it was in Stockholm

Midfielder spotted in London, has offer from Chelsea – Club ‘convinced’ player could join Blues http://sportwitness.co.uk/midfielder-spotted-london-offer-Chelsea-club-convinced-player-join-blues/ Chelsea are frequently named as a main contender to sign Ilaix Moriba. The midfielder turned down the Blues and other clubs in favour of signing a contract with Barcelona in 2019 and that decision paid off after Ronald Koeman gave him opportunities last season. With a contract expiring in 2022, the La Liga side have failed to find an agreement over a new deal. This has alerted the likes of the west London club and RB Leipzig, while he’s made to train with the reserves. On August 25th, Mundo Deportivo explained the 18-year-old was spotted in London at the weekend. Thursday’s edition of AS explains offers from the top European clubs are raining down for the Guinean, but they only name Thomas Tuchel’s side and Leipzig. They add Moriba is currently out of the dynamics of Barca’s first team. Real Madrid were credited with an interest, but a ‘confidential’ report from Sport says Los Blancos will not make an approach for the player due to the ‘non-aggression pact’ agreed between Joan Laporta and Florentino Pérez in recent months. The two Spanish giants, along with Juventus, have agreed not to make an approach for each other’s players, unless it’s a ‘beneficial operation’ for the clubs involved in the deal. Therefore, at the Camp Nou, they have ruled out Moriba joining Real Madrid. Sport add Barcelona are ‘convinced’ if Moriba doesn’t sign an extension, which seems impossible as of now, he will start an adventure abroad, either at Chelsea or Leipzig.

I never once had a go at that poster, nor they at me, so curious why they said that

Kurt Zouma Set for West Ham United Medical https://lastwordonsports.com/football/2021/08/26/kurt-zouma-set-for-west-ham-united-medical/

da fuq are you calling ME a plastic?

varsågod

https://www.chelseamegastore.com/en/Chelsea-men-football-kits/t-32111757+ga-12+d-8972545048+z-9-349109571?pageSize=72&pageNumber=2&sortOption=TopSellers&cs=19

Chelsea unveil Nike’s latest eyesore with the 2021-22 third kit https://weaintgotnohistory.sbnation.com/2021/8/26/22642496/Chelsea-unveil-nikes-latest-eyesore-with-the-2021-22-third-kit An over-designed home shirt with it’s clashing mish-mash of “kaleidoscopic” patterns, and a rather randomly black-hooped but otherwise comfortably yellow away shirt, have now been joined by a programming error of a third shirt, as unveiled officially by the club this morning. Nike supposedly “worked with individual Chelsea fans involved in the fashion industry to inform the kit design” but there’s probably a good reason said individuals have remained anonymous. The shirt is inspired by yet another Nike product line (ACG) and is also supposed to be “reflective of a modern era for the club, characterised by youthful energy and everything that represents” — which is a whole lot of words to say a whole lot of nothing. It’s a shirt possibly inspired by streetwear, but it might have turned out better if it were inspired by sportswear instead. In any case, should you choose to adorn yourself with this teal and black and reddish orange “crimson” monstrosity, you can spend way too much money on them in all the usual places.

Mercato : pour Kylian Mbappé, le PSG veut 220 millions d’euros ! Par la voix de son directeur sportif Leonardo, le PSG a ouvert la porte à un transfert de Kylian Mbappé. Mais à des conditions très éloignées des 160 millions d’euros proposés par le Real Madrid. https://www.leparisien.fr/sports/football/psg/mercato-pour-kylian-mbappe-le-psg-veut-220-millions-deuros-25-08-2021-OUUMGWQRBBCDNNOILB5LC67BZU.php Mercato: for Kylian Mbappé, PSG wants 220 million euros! Through the voice of its sports director Leonardo, PSG opened the door to a transfer of Kylian Mbappé. But on conditions very far from the 160 million euros offered by Real Madrid. According to L’Equipe, that figure stands at €200m + add-ons.

they are often accurate on French football teams and players not saying they are infallible, but often they speak truth deffo not a troll, for what that is worth

yet he is worshipped as a god by Real, Barca, Manure, Pool, Bayern, and Juve plastics 🤢

Tiraspol is the capital of Transnistria (de facto), a breakaway state from Moldova (de jure), where it is the second largest city. Transnistria, officially the Pridnestrovian Moldavian Republic (PMR) is a breakaway state in the narrow strip of land between the river Dniester and the Ukrainian border that is internationally recognized as part of Moldova. Its capital and largest city is Tiraspol. Transnistria has been recognised by only three other mostly unrecognised breakaway states: Abkhazia, Artsakh, and South Ossetia. Meet the People of a Soviet Country That Doesn't Exist Transnistria is the country no one's ever heard of ... except for the 500,000 people that call it home. https://www.wired.com/2016/03/meet-people-transnistria-stuck-time-soviet-country-doesnt-exist/ TRANSNISTRIA IS A thin strip of land wedged between Moldova and Ukraine. It is home to more than 500,000 people and has a parliamentary government, a standing army, and its own currency. It has all the trappings of an independent nation---but isn't. Oh sure, it declared independence from Moldova in 1990 and fought a war two years later. And it's got a constitution and a flag and even a coat of arms. But you won't find it on many maps, and not a single member of the United Nations recognizes its existence. But the people of Transnistria do not care. They cling tenaciously to a claim of statehood and their love for all things Russian. “It’s quite tragic, really,” says Justin Barton, a British photographer who visited the countr.... er, autonomous territorial unit last year for his series The Transnistrian Patriot. “There are a lot of people who are very patriotic, but there are also a lot of other people just caught in the situation. And they’re amazingly isolated," he says. It all started in 1990, when Moldova broke away from the Soviet Union. Transnistria was home to many Russians and Russian speakers who felt political and cultural isolation in the new republic. They declared independence, hoping to establish a socialist republic and remain part of the Soviet Union. A war ensued, which ended in a ceasefire nearly two years later. The Soviet Union had crumbled by then, and the conflict never fully resolved even though Moldova granted Transnistria a measure of autonomy. To all outward appearances, Transnistria is a sovereign state, albeit one that skews Soviet. Its flag includes the hammer and sickle and often flies alongside Russian flags. The Transnistrian ruble bears the images of Russian figures like the Gen. Alexander Suvorov and Catherine the Great. An enormous statue of Lenin guards the entrance to the Supreme Soviet, its parliament building. Pictures of Stalin and Putin are almost as ubiquitous as those of Transnistrian president Yevgeny Shevchuk. In return, Russia provides free gas and supplements residents' pensions. It also provides more than 1,000 troops, to the consternation of those in Ukraine. Still, Russia has not formally recognized the breakaway state, and does not appear inclined to. Nor does Moldova. This does not bode well. “Despite Transnistria declaring its own independence, it will not achieve it, unless Moldova decides to recognize it—an unlikely scenario,” says Thomas de Waal, a British journalist and an expert on Eastern Europe. "The most likely future is either more of the same—an unrecognized status and shadowy semi-statehood, or a confederation agreement with Moldova.” Barton became interested in Transnistria in 2014 while working in Ukraine. He heard that Transnistria was producing new plastic currency with colorful coins in different shapes. His interest piqued, Barton read all he could about the topic and decided to visit Transnistria and photograph its residents. It required a month of pleading with the Transnistrian KGB, which runs security, before Barton was cleared to photograph top officials. It helped that his wife is Russian and he had an especially well-connected fixer. He spent a little more than two weeks there over the course of two trips. Many of the people Barton photographed were intensely patriotic, though he couldn't always parse their political views. In Tiraspol, he found Natalia Yefremova and her small trinket shop. It sells busts of Stalin and busts of Putin, and it wasn't clear whether she favored communist or capitalist Russia. Barton also photographed Igor Nebeygolova, a colonel in the KGB and commander of the Cossack regiment in Tiraspol. A huge flag from Russia's imperial era adorned the wall of his office, along with Soviet and Transnistrian flags. "His loyalties seemed deeply split," Barton says. "Everything he had was a symbol of one thing or another." Barton photographed some 20 people in all. He used a Nikon D810 and favored wider shots that emphasize the environment as much as the person. "You can find out a great deal about a place and, in particular, a mental space [that way]," he says. It's impossible to escape the sense of melancholy that pervades the series. It isn't easy being stateless, and not everyone is optimistic about Transnistria's future. Anastasia Spatar, who is 23 and has never traveled beyond Transnistria, showed great sadness when Barton asked her to think about her homeland. "[She said] she might burst into tears," he says. Barton found the experience as surreal as the country that isn't. He recalls a conversation he had with a local of Transnistria he met while exploring Tiraspol. "Welcome to nowhere," he told Barton.

needs to be an OBLIGATION to buy ffs, even if only 16, 17m euros or so he just turned 27yo 8 days ago, so is not at an age he is worthless at all, and he had a lot of good games for AC Milan, Napoli, and Monaco (on his return) he just is not up to the pace of EPL, but Serie A is his speed