Melanicus

A few stats from last season about our new German Andre Schurrle compared with some of our players from last season. (League only) Goals: 11 (Lampard had our most with 12) Assists: 7 (Mata had our most with 12 Shots per game: 3.6, most in the Bundesliga (Demba Ba averaged 3.3) Successful dribbles per game: 3.2 (Hazard had our most with 1.8) Turnovers per game: 1.9 (Torres had our most with 1.9) Key passes per game: 1.2 (Mata had our most with 2.7) Accurate crosses per game: 0.5 (Mata had our most with 1.3) Shot accuracy: 57% (Hazard had our highest with 60%) Average pass completion: 79% (Mikel had our highest with 88.9%) He had the most shots (122) and also missed the most clear cut chances (20) of all players in the Bundesliga last season. Of 125 players with 10+ goals in Europe's top 5 leagues last season he had the 2nd worst conversion rate (9%).

You don't need to be a footballer or super rich to attract ladies. Just my 5 cents.

Fernando Torres and Sergio Ramos seen leaving 1Oak nightclub in NYC

Press Conference was as i expected, very calm and mature and not giving much away. Highlight surely has to be him as good as confirming De Bruyne and Lukaku will be part of the team next season. The only thing i ever seem to take away from these press conferences is just simply how shit the questions asked are and asked more than once! Absolutely stealing a living these mugs!

Marko Marin maybe? No? OK, I wouldn't want him too...

Jose Mourinho: “(Kevin-Prince) Boateng to Chelsea? We want footballers, not models. Last year he had more haircuts than goals scored.” Source: Ghanasoccernet

On a serious note. 11.24: Mourinho submits Chelsea bid for Napoli's Edinson Cavani #ADL 11.51: Napoli Still Want Ramires In Cavani Deal #SV12.00: Torres unfazed by speculation #CC12.17: Chelsea closing in on Uruguayan #FFC12.23: Napoli set to reject €55m Chelsea bid for Edinson Cavani #F

Transfer news: Fernando Torres planning long-term stay at Chelsea http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11095/8764709/?

THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES It’s been a real pleasure and an honor to wear the blue shirt for 5 years. Coming from Lyon after four successful years with as many champion titles, it was a real challenge to sign for CHELSEA F.C. with the ambition to succeed in the best league in the world: the English Premier League. One of the main reason why I decided to sign for this club was to win the European CHAMPIONS LEAGUE and I couldn’t imagine a better scenario than winning the best club trophy in the world for my last CHELSEA game. Over the five years I’ve defended the club’s colors, I’ve really enjoyed the great moments I lived amongst players and technical staff with the aim to deserve the daily support from our loyal fans, and I always tried to make them proud. Every good thing must come to an end, and even if I had to wait for a whole season at the club’s academy, I’m very proud of all my achievements as a Chelsea player. I’m free now to carry on my career, so I wish all the best to all my blue friends; I’ll always support CHELSEA F.C… - Florent Malouda

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQvlSDaKtgg

I know that feel bro.

Couldn't wait for this season to end. Now I can't wait for next one to start.

Just show me you're special and don't listen to this fat Brazilian dude over here.

You sure are readable, my darling. I'm afraid you'll need to work harder for my attention.

@Barbara, Did you come all the way here, just to flirt with me?

Barnsley have released John Rooney, younger brother of Manchester United striker Wayne, after deciding not to offer the midfielder a new contract. Rooney, 22, signed a contract with the Championship outfit in October after leaving American side Orlando City. The midfielder failed to make a single appearance for the Yorkshire club and has subsequently seen his stay at Oakwell cut short. Matt Done, Rob Edwards and Stephen Foster have also been released by the club. Your thoughts?

Bring the man on my profile pic to the Stamford Bridge!

MY REACTION: (valdes is my mom)

Chelsea Football Club is delighted to announce the appointment of Jose Mourinho as First Team Manager.

Jose Mourinho confirms he will be the next Chelsea manager #TN Mourinho confident of Blues return #E&S Mourinho: I will be Chelsea boss #SL Mourinho confirms Chelsea return #TT Jose Mourinho expects to be Chelsea boss by the end of the week #L24 Mourinho 'joining Chelsea' #S24 Jose Mourinho claims he will be named Chelsea manager this week #SSN EXCLUSIVE: Jose Mourinho out to strike deal that returns glory days to Chelsea #SE JOSE MOURINHO: CHELSEA PEOPLE LOVE ME #DS Jose Mourinho confirms he will be Chelsea manager by the end of the week #M José Mourinho Confirms Chelsea Appointment by 'End of Week' #IBT Jose Mourinho: 'I will be back at Chelsea by the end of the week' #LES + 100 OTHER SOURCES I guess we can easily say now, Mourinho welcome back! :cfc:

CHELSEA are ready to sell David Luiz and Branislav Ivanovic to Barcelona for a combined £40million. #DS

CHELSEA are ready to sell David Luiz and Branislav Ivanovic to Barcelona for a combined £40million. #DS

You never know. Maybe Mourinho actually hinted to our board that he wants Schurrle.

Here is an article from official Premier League website, if anyone missed it. http://goo.gl/1opBk It was also dated on 3th of June so it will probably be officialy announced tommorow.

Bring mothafucking Luka here.