Fulham Broadway 17,312 Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 FERGUSON IN FURIOUS ROW WITH OWN REFLECTION SIR ALEX Ferguson has ordered all the mirrors to be removed from Old Trafford following a blazing row with his own reflection. Ferguson has issued a 'me or him' ultimatum to the United boardFerguson said: "I've behaved terribly and I've really gone down in my own estimation. Until I have the decency to look myself in the face and apologise I'd prefer if I'm not in the same room."When I've won as many titles as I have, then I can try to eyeball myself like that. I'm a disgrace and I'll be reporting myself to the FA for calling myself that. Then again, I shouldn't expect more from the likes of me."To ensure Ferguson does not have to confront his own face, every surface in the stadium has been repainted in a matte finish and bespectacled staff have been ordered to either wear contact lenses or place a bag on their head.The Glazer family has also refinanced its £500m debt to buy a huge weather machine to deflect storm clouds that might dump dangerously reflective puddles into the manager's path.Groundsman Charlie Reeves said: "The orbit of Sir Alex's eternally-incandescent strop has slowly wound down as the years have gone by and gradually turned itself inwards."Three years ago, he'd have a blue fit at anybody vaguely Scottish in the building, now he's having mingehuffs with his own reflection. Give it another 12 months and his lungs will start knocking shite out of each other inside his own ribcage."The argument begain after the Manchester United manager pulled faces at himself while shaving. Before he could lunge at the reflection with his razor, he was dragged away by assistant Mike Phelan, who sat him down on the toilet and gave him some chewing gum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drogba11CFC 108 Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 (edited) Edited January 18, 2010 by Drogba11CFC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zolayes 14,489 Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 PRICELESS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badboy 1,526 Posted January 19, 2010 Share Posted January 19, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rubber bullets 1,183 Posted January 19, 2010 Share Posted January 19, 2010 Ha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.