Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross

[Fulham Broadway 16,432]

BRITISH PUBLIC IN DEPRESSINGLY INCOHERENT OUTBURST

PUBLIC outrage at the treatment of Andrew Sachs boiled over last night as Britain reached a new peak of furious incoherence.

Hattie Jacques

News websites struggled to cope as millions of violently confused readers found themselves unable to contain their angry, stultifyingly ill-informed opinions.

A BBC spokesman said: "Britain is obviously trying to tell us something but they need to slow down and do their very best to communicate in whole sentences."

Some of the comments posted on The Times yesterday:

I don't know who these people are or what this is all about but thanks to them I have spent

the entire morning being violently sick on my neighbour's car. It's a bridge too far. Or is it two bridges not too far enough? Bring back Hattie Jacques!

Mrs Margaret, Guildford

How would they like it if someone came into their bedroom in the middle of the night and drenched them in gin and started fondling their legs and then playing with their willy until it made a horrid mess? Not very much, is what I think. Filthy boys. We should kill them with lions.

jstraw, Blackburn

Thankfully I missed this whole sordid episode. When will the BBC do the right thing and repeat in full? I get back from work around six.

Chewbacca, Norwich

But the granddaughter though eh? She's not exactly, you know, is she? I mean come on, let's not forget what this is really all about. Exactly. She'll have her baps out in teh Sunday Tabloids. Hopefully.

Vote UKIP!

paddingtonbear69, Macclesfield

This reminds me of the time the Dimbleby brothers phoned me up during 'Any Answers' and offered to wank me into a teapot. I see the BBC hasn't changed one bit. Filthy bastards.

Andypandy, Taunton

[terry26 6]

lol

a deep-throat to call their own

altho i can't stand Brand anyway

[oxfordblues 299]

this is all about sky v bbc.who can get one up on the other,will rap music be banned next,ohhhhhhhh yes please!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Fulham Broadway 16,432]

Russell Brand has resigned and fair play to him, he can be quite funny as well. Now the head of Radio 2 has resigned, she shouldnt have done really.

The spineless one thats got away with it is the totally untalented Ross. When you listen to the call, its him that says ''Brand fucked your grandaughter''.

Ross' show is just an excuse to have guests that he can talk over, interrupt, and make schoolboyish sexual innuendos. He really is a talentless wanker -who is paid £18 million out of our licence money.

[Kez 2,727]

Russel Brands just an annoying cunt thats not funny