JayC

Cheers. Same goes. And yeah I'm here til kick-off, then I'll pop back afterwards. I'm hoping for a good one too. Can't wait at this point!

I always wanted a female thing.

After all you said about conspiracies. You've got a lot of growing up to do, young one.

Is this funny? Does that calm you down? He's coming for you! haha ;p

Put your head in the fryer.

Not when I won't be commenting again, in this thread.

I'll continue to tell truth about people.I don't care if it means calling them what they are. Deep down you all know I'm right. This so called fan is letting you all down with these pathetic comments.

You're a vile rancid stain on this forum.

Frankly, I had given up with this thread. Some recent posters before you made it into a joke. This is a very good post though. It doesn't take a lot to be a normal person and write something fair. Well done. Ankit too.

Are you really this misinformed? You've just stated a defender playing for the champions can't defend. That is effectively a whole man down. So we won the title with ten men? Go check his stats for last season, and watch some games maybe, you'll see how badly wrong you are. This is a dire statement.

I wouldn't worry. It's 99% this won't happen. Jose won't give us Mata anymore than we'd give you van Persie.

You've spoiled the Pirates of the Caribbean theme! You could have went for the Black Pearl (Ramires) since you all value him. ;p You fail!

The Flying Dutchman will do the damage anyway! ;p

If you want to push for the title the fact is your team needs one more big goal scorer in my opinion. All the top teams going for it have at least one. Spurs; Soldado City; Aguero, Dzeko, Possibly Negredo too. United; RvP, Rooney. Hernandez (capable of it if started) Chelsea? Closest is Torres who scored two less goals than an impact substitute for us. It's not good enough. Your top scorer was Lampard of which some were penalties. The fire power is lacking. As good as Mata is, I don't know if he can score twelve goals again. Then again he could even increase it. Still... it's not enough in my opinion. Jose seems reluctant to give Lukaku the ball to run with, so I don't know. I think having three midfielders in positions 1,2,3... tells the story. Our top three are all proper forwards. I beg you Jose, take Wayne. Give us Mata and I will love you forever. ;p

Well you want one of our top-five players. It would make no sense at all to strengthen Chelsea and weaken us at the same time. It's going to come down to how desperate Jose is for Rooney. Jose is a gambler though - if there is any substance to this I think he will definitely consider it. However I can't even remember the last time any sort of swap deal actually happened (with players of high stature and value) it's unlikely in my honest opinion. Considering prices out of interest - I'd pay £40m for Mata in a heartbeat. I think Rooney is worth about £30m if we're talking just player value. If it's a straight swap, we would be getting the best deal. Perhaps Jose sees Rooney as the last player he needs to collect a lot of trophies and doesn't really need Mata anyway.

I tap out.

He's a proper player. On a serious note, if you were to sell us Mata - we'd arguably have the two best players in the league. RvP and Mata. It must be at least a bit tempting for Mata surely, to link with RvP. It probably ups his assist rate by 5-10 too.

Mourinho isn't stupid. However he is packed in midfield, and light up front. I'm not holding my breath, but it would actually make sense. It would undoubtedly strengthen us though. Oh dear.... stop it...

I'd actually ejaculate...if we get Mata.

I control the Kraken, damn you! ;p

I missed this earlier. Is this finally the time you realise I'm not here to troll your team? Some praise for my posting which to be honest, I never thought I'd see from you. Thank you. As for Chelsea analysis - that is kind of the point of me being here. I mean you should welcome a different perspective if it's delivered in the correct manner. Telling you about my team is too easy - it's why I don't bother with United forums - it's a constant stream of identical posts, that learn me nothing other than how stupid some fans are. Our fan base is a strange one. You either find a brilliant football fan with plenty of knowledge or an utter tool. Well in my experience. I don't know why you prefer me to look only at my team. It doesn't make any logical sense. What harm does my one small opinion have on a huge community of Chelsea fans? If I was saying things that are stupid I wouldn't be able to escape it. I already get quite a lot of attention due to my team, and being the only United fan on here (I think) - I really think you should show some maturity and join in, rather than getting on my back. For example - I know Newcastle like the back of my hand, due to having a brother who supports them. I know Liverpool quite well because I enjoy that rivalry and like to keep up to date on what is happening there. I know Everton because I have a very good friend from down there. I could go on.... and name more teams, and not just in the premiership. There is nothing wrong with having a healthy thirst for football knowledge, being a massive fan of the game! I enjoy to watch your team play because I've always had a weird infatuation with left-footed players - and I just love Mata. He is everything football is about; grace, technique and ball control. Players like him and RvP don't come about too often. I like to enjoy them. Anyway I'm rambling again. Bottom line is - I'm not here to bother you, or rub our success in your face, or even laugh at your donkey of a striker Torres! I think I've been very fair with what I've said since joining, and maybe I'm not always right - but I'm only ever giving a balanced view from the knowledge I have. So yeah, if you like my posting - leave me be..... or it's the Kraken for you!!!

I can see how you may have thought I was riled at some points, but I really wasn't. When you're being fed consistent head-scratching lies, or horrifically judged summations, it's a time where I question my time invested. I was frustrated, misunderstood, and being stalked by some crazy bushman....Flashbacks of Wolf Creek began to arise in my mind.... I must hide! I'm simply a pirate now. My disguise will fool bushman. On a serious note. No problem. Yeah I'd appreciate the read. Did you use much of what I gave you? Well I guess I'll find out soon enough.

Don't forget your toolkit on the way out. You've been busy here.

It wasn't meant to be an XI. Also if you want perfect write-up's - I want paid! I wrote that pretty quickly! But seriously it wasn't a team. It looks like it with subs, but I didnt even count how many players went in, since I just tried to match up all of our big players against each other....That's all. Comparisons were with full squad availability. Injury free. Yeah I got De Bruyne all wrong...... spank meh. It's good to see people recognising Evra's talents though. On Cech - I think I can agree to call it a draw then. Overall ability I really don't know mind. I've watched De Gea pull off some crazy diving saves, I don't think anybody else in the world is capable of. He actually flies...

Jack Sparrow: "Don't make me unleash the Kraken on you!"