Man City's squad before the start of the season

[chrismada9 1,948]

Manchester City squad 2009-2010

Goalkeepers

Shay Given

Kasper Schmeichel

Gordon Brown (Bought Legally for £100m after he confirmed he would leave the Prime Minister's post)

defenders

Pablo Zabaleta

Micah Richards

Carlos Puyol (Bought for £200m after Al-Fahim constantly kept saying "por favor" in his ear every 5 seconds)

Nemanja Vidic (Bought for £200m after Al-Fahim told him that if he could touch his nose with his tongue, he would sign up)

Arnold Schwarzenegger (a big name!! A big fella!! Al-Fahim wanted this giant ... er ... wrinkly geezer at the back of his defense... at the end of the day he is a superstar.... the most expensive buy at £600m)

Javier Garrido (no-one knows about him, but he stayed anyway because he knew he could get £200,000 every week.

midfielders

Martin Petrov

Stephen Ireland

Kaka (whoops sorry Al-Fahim couldn't get him, he went to Madrid Instead)

Cesc Fabregas (He wanted to stay at Arsenal, but a massive £500m bid by Al-Fahim was too good to refuse)

Tom Cruise (bought legally for £400m after Al-Fahim told him that he had to divorce his wife Katie Holmes in order for the deal to go through)

Robinho (the second cheapest player valued at £32.5 million. He wanted to go to Chelsea, but went to City instead because Roman Calderon told him to go there because he thought Chelsea were morons and didn't want to sell to them)

Bill Gates (Bought for £400m..... Bill Jumped at the chance of having a massive instant wod of cash, so he joined)

Gareth Barry (A one man club at Villa!! But it was all about the money who took him to City, he was the cheapest player at justs £12m)

strikers

Carlos Tevez (City's recent signing and the second most cheapest of the players, joining for just £25 million! There was a choice between a better chance lifting the Champions League with another big Premiership club or waste your life at City while getting lots of cash... and he chose City.. what a plonker!

Valeri Bojinov (who? didn't know he played for them!)

Gene Hackman (class actor! he was bought by Al-Fahim for £300m)

Wayne Rooney (For some reason, money attracted him, and he was couped up for £400m)

Roque Santa Cruz

Emmanuel Adebayor

Craig Bellamy

Felipe Caicedo

Woody Allen

Barack Obama*

George W. Bush*

MANAGER:

Steven Spielberg (he was paid £100m a year to conduct the perfect story of the season for a bunch of money grabbing twats after it was apparent that Mark Hughes wasn't a big enough star to manage the team)

* (a combined deal which Cost Manchester City £500m for each player)

[Kez 2,727]

Sounds about right

[Drogba11CFC 108]

Wouldn't Mario be there as well?

[Mungii 3]

They just need a Mr bean to cry with them!!

[BlueLion. 21,491]

You're forgetting their brand new strike force of Lilo and Stich.

[chrismada9 1,948]

You're forgetting their brand new strike force of Lilo and Stich.

Ahh yes of course, they were both signed up for another £500m each