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The Pub - Discuss Anything


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Finally have internet so I'll be posting more. In other news here is some photos of my son

Talking of marriage and seeing as the thread is already de-railed - I got married at the weekend It was amazing - hired a marquee and had Dodgems and a carousel along with a double decker bus convert

Just got thrown out of my local swimming pool (luckily theres more than one). Anyway in the foyer coming out, there was a lifesize cardboard Gerrard, advertising some sports drink or something. At the

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I'd rather be an ugly skinny fuck than an Australian

The two are often mutually inclusive.

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GUYS I HAVE BAD NEWS THIS IS IT. CLICK ON THAT PICTURE I JUST UPLOADED AND SCREEN CAPTURED

here is the link : http://ssd.jpl.nasa.gov/sbdb.cgi?sstr=2015%20HM10&orb=1

THIS IS IT. THE CLOSE APPROACH OF ASTEROID (2015 HM10) WILL COME [ EARTH DISTANCE : 0.005 AU ] CLOSE TO EARTH ON TUESDAY 7 JULY 2015.

attachicon.gifASTEROID (2015 HM10) CLOSE APPROACH TO EARTH TUESDAY 7 JULY 2015.png

0.005 Astronomical Units = 464 779.036 miles
Distance around the world = 24,902 miles
That asteroid is over 18 earth's away....
What's the bad news?
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Bloke I know down the real pub just told me he had two escorts yesterday. While he was banging one the other was noshing his nutsack, and they swapped.

Told him thats filthy, disgusting. Should be ashamed of himself as he has a girlfriend as well.

I was also jealous, but didnt mention it

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TalkChelsea administrator Alex says the forum "has no plans" to sell star cockwomble Liquidator to theshedend.com.

Reports on Tuesday suggested that the young forumer may have been the subject of interest from theshedend but TalkChelsea's assistant manager has said otherwise.

"There has been no contact", began Alex. "Either way, Harry isn't for sale.

"He is a valuable asset. In the current market it isn't easy to find young, English talent. Harry is proof of that. He's fucking useless. But he's useless in a kind of loveable and charming manner, and we have no plans to sell him".

Liquidator had been quoted in The Mirror as saying: "I have no desire to leave but if TalkChelsea wants to sell then the market is open".

Alex then confirmed that any potential bid "would be blocked instantly".

More to follow.

This is arguably the greatest post in TalkChelsea's history. Also, what is a "cockwomble"? Is that some weird British word?
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This is arguably the greatest post in TalkChelsea's history. Also, what is a "cockwomble"? Is that some weird British word?

It's an Alex word.

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This is arguably the greatest post in TalkChelsea's history. Also, what is a "cockwomble"? Is that some weird British word?

Google it and find out :lol:

It's an Alex word.

Used to describe you Jakey :wub:

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Where's Rmpr? I need to tell him that I'm a hit with the ladies of Rio De Janeiro on tinder

Yeah, where is that fucker actually! [emoji35][emoji31][emoji40][emoji3]

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Where's Rmpr? I need to tell him that I'm a hit with the ladies of Rio De Janeiro on tinder

Yeah, where is that fucker actually! [emoji35][emoji31][emoji40][emoji3]

I think he is really addicted to Final Fantasy Online. He is always playing that on Steam. It could be his brother but...

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Bloke I know down the real pub just told me he had two escorts yesterday. While he was banging one the other was noshing his nutsack, and they swapped.

Told him thats filthy, disgusting. Should be ashamed of himself as he has a girlfriend as well.

I was also jealous, but didnt mention it

The UPS driver who comes to my work told me a story yesterday of when he was in Thailand. He paid £60 (whatever that is in Thai money) for 6 girls to come back to his hotel room. 5 would sit in the bathroom while 1 was with him in the bedroom. After 10 mins she would get off, walk into the bathroom and another would come out. Couldn't tell if he was bullshitting or not.

My favourite quote from the story though was 'thank fuck for those little blue pills' :lol:

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Fucking mushrooms are growing in one of my gumamela pots. Cunts have to die and never return. I hate having to buy more soil for this.

/rant

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Fucking mushrooms are growing in one of my gumamela pots. Cunts have to die and never return. I hate having to buy more soil for this.

/rant

Calm down, grandma, anger is not good for your heart...

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