America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare & without the guns? (Recommended) Mark Clattenburg is due on the pitch for a Chelsea-Liverpool game and is nowhere to be seen. The FA representative goes looking for him and finds him in the dressing room and says, "Hey, Mark, why are you in here and not on the pitch?" Clattenburg says, "I'm trying to do this jigsaw puzzle that my wife gave me." Representative: "I don't care about a damn puzzle, get out on the pitch." David: "No. I've been trying for weeks to do this jigsaw, and it's all I can think of right now." Representative: "What's the puzzle of?" Clattenburg: "It's a tiger." The representative looks over Clattenburg's shoulder at the puzzle laid out on the floor and says, "For fuck's sake! Put the Frosties back in the box and get out on the pitch!"